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General :
It's not fair and I'm angry about it.

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 cuppacoffee (original poster member #39313) posted at 4:16 AM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

The ow gets to live her life like nothing happened. Her bf posts on the FB (his is open) about how awesome of a gf he has. She gets to go to parties we were invited to because we are avoiding her. She get to walk around happy with her life. She gets to keep all of her friends and continue her perfect facade.

I sit here in anger and pain. It is not fair. I walk around sad and barely able to function.

I'm like a vacuum bag
That holds all that old dirt
Remember that time we said we'd be together forever?
Don't hate me, don't regret me, don't ever forget me
Wherever you go, whatever you do, don't say I never loved you

posts: 363   ·   registered: May. 20th, 2013
id 6379177
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wtf2 ( member #33952) posted at 4:35 AM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

I was you 3 years ago.

Her "perfect life" - a facade. Truly happy people with perfect lives, don't do what she did.

Today, almost 3 years layer, I'm no more in such pain. I'm going to event where she might ge there, because I (almost) don't give a flying fuck.

She's still an asshole.

It gets better. I promise.

Me - BW. Able to feel happy again. Sometimes.
Him - FWH. He did the unfuckable
3 superstar kids - light of my life
OW - used to be one of my closest friends
A - lasted 1 year
DD - Jan 2011
R'ed

posts: 212   ·   registered: Nov. 17th, 2011
id 6379199
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musiclovingmom ( member #38207) posted at 4:45 AM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

I know exactly how you feel. I had to change where I was going to stop to buy a couple of essential items this weekend because she was walking across the parking lot toward the entrance while we were looking for a parking space. I told my H that it isn't fair that she gets to walk around doing whatever and I have to be concerned about running into her everywhere. It isn't fair that I can't run a basic errand without fear of how I will react if I bump into her. And all this because of choices THEY made that I had no say in. His answer was heartfelt and honest: 'I know it isn't fair, and I'm sorry that I put you into this situation.'

posts: 1764   ·   registered: Jan. 21st, 2013
id 6379209
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caregiver9000 ( member #28622) posted at 4:54 AM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

It's not fair. Nothing about infidelity is. But you are a decent human being and she is lying deceitful pond scum.

Me: fortysomething, independent, happy,
XH "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
two kids, teens. Old enough I am truly NO CONTACT w/ NPD zebraduck
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

posts: 7063   ·   registered: May. 27th, 2010   ·   location: a better place
id 6379218
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brokenfinger ( new member #39586) posted at 5:38 AM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

I had to avoid the main street where I would go across town, because the shitface was living with the OW, and I had yet to tell my kids.

I avoid walmart, cause the OW works there...kinda wish I had gotten to see the shiner I gave her, I heard it was epic!

I think I'm almost ready to venture to Walmart again, head held high. She can have that cheating, lying SOB.

I did see her running a few weeks ago, and had to fight the urge to run her ass over...I figure I got away with assault, I should 't push it.

I'm looking forward to not being so fucking angry. I don't want him, but I sure wish he was sorry he fucked over his family, and showed a little remorse.

There is no stronger message, then dirt in your face.

posts: 49   ·   registered: Jun. 18th, 2013   ·   location: Canada
id 6379244
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Getting to Happy ( member #35200) posted at 6:03 AM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

Her bf posts on the FB (his is open) about how awesome of a gf he has.

Now you know that is BullSh*t! Her BF must be drinking Unicorn Fart Koolaide! His shiny pot metal GF is gutter stupper, fake, fake, Fake!

Who cares what they write!

I insisted that he put the word out on Whorestein (our own personal AP). She has really aged and has no friends or job prospects. Everyone has shunned her. Mr. Happy was her main employer. He shut her DOWN.

But to look at her FB page, it would seem that she is in Rainbow Skittle shitting paradise. "oh I'm so fab, my life is great, Blah, blah-de-blah".

What-everrrr!

Just know that that delusional crap is just a continuance of what ails broken people.

Justification and self deceptions are hallmarks of adulterers.

I know that you are in pain for many reasons but please don't let this instance get you down.

Hold your head up because she never will. EVER!

WS him
BS me DD's 26, 25' DS 23
dd1 1-1-10, dd2 Mothers Day 2011, dd3 3-12-12 Hawaii trip with ho-worker...

Never forget what is worth remembering or remember what is best forgotten.
Unknown

posts: 1254   ·   registered: Apr. 1st, 2012   ·   location: La La Land
id 6379259
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Bluebird26 ( member #36445) posted at 7:21 AM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

I am sorry you are here. It does truly stink they get to live their pretend happy lives and we get to wallow in the pain and misery they caused.

It does get better, try not to allow her to live rent free in her head.

Does her BF know? If not I would be sending him a message on FB to let him know what a cheating pond scum of a girlfriend he has. If he does know and wants to pretend his life is happy and normal that is his problem not yours.

Do yourself a favour though, block them on FB and detach, keep accessing their info will only hurt you more.

Me: BW

Best thing I gained in my divorce - my freedom.

Life's good.

posts: 1530   ·   registered: Aug. 12th, 2012   ·   location: Australia
id 6379302
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OnAnIsland ( member #34319) posted at 7:34 AM on Wednesday, June 19th, 2013

Focus on you. Block them from FB. I blocked marriedOW from our lives and it is great. Even when I think about looking on FB, I know that I can't. I am blessed by a few countries between me and her lovely dysfunction.

You will heal and be stronger and wiser for it. It will take time and you will be a different you.

D-day: Christmas 2011
D-day 2: 3/28/2013

Married for over 15 years
2 beautiful sons

You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them. Maya Angelou

posts: 1486   ·   registered: Dec. 28th, 2011
id 6379306
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Mousse242 ( member #6330) posted at 2:12 AM on Thursday, June 20th, 2013

Does her BS know about the affair? Do your friends?

posts: 5485   ·   registered: Jan. 27th, 2005   ·   location: Chicago
id 6380533
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