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User Topic: Keeping track of kids' medical expenses & reimbursements
♀ 32554
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 2:03 AM, June 19th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

How do you keep track of medical expenses for your kids & the reimbursements? I've been trying to craft something in Excel, but it's piddly. In part I'm rebelling against the whole notion of making pdf files & emails & keeping track of when I sent what expense to STBX and when he did or didn't pay me his portion.

And in part I'm pissed at how unfairly I have to shoulder the majority, if not all, of the children's medical expenses that aren't covered by insurance. STBX makes about 90K. I am unemployed, and when I do finally get a job it's going to be piss-ant wages. But I am and will continue to bear the brunt of the children's medical expenses.

But I digress...

So how do you keep track of it all?

Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!

Posts: 10722 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
♀ 36445
Member # 36445
Default  Posted: 4:33 AM, June 19th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have a excel spreadsheet, I email him the spreadsheet + copies of the receipts & out of pocket differences. I send it to him on the first of each new month. Normally he will pay within 2 months

But he is now refusing to pay unless I provide him a copy of the divorce papers, sorry poor baby that is not my job anymore do your own dirty work My lawyer is going to love this one.

Me: BW

Best thing I gained in my divorce - my freedom.

Life's good.

Posts: 1530 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Australia
♂ 16953
Member # 16953
Default  Posted: 5:15 AM, June 19th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Excel is a great tool for this task. Its easy to create. Its as simple as color coding what he has paid and/or what you are still due. Its also a great way to track your expenses for tax purposes. You can also create a standard remittal form on WORD. Just fill in the blanks and attach a copy of said services from the provider. Keep a folder in hard copy form. When he pays just update Excel. Simple !!!!

You cant eat soup with chopsticks.

Posts: 6851 | Registered: Nov 2007
♀ 33882
Member # 33882
Default  Posted: 5:16 AM, June 19th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm struggling with getting a system for this in place too.
So far I have been emailing him a PDF of whatever bill it is and copying myself, and then routing all of those into a dedicated folder in my email. Our SA states that he is to pay his share within 30 days, so the sent date is day 1.

Me - BW
2 DDs

Very happily divorced from an NPD since 2013.

Posts: 4055 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: MA
♀ 35889
Member # 35889
Default  Posted: 8:36 AM, June 19th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I snap a photo of the receipt and forward it to him.

I use google docs to store the spreadsheets (so they are accessible from any computer), and forward him the spreadsheet detailing the date, provider, full amount I paid and his portion due to me.

Because he likes to play a little game where reimbursements are late and not for the correct amount, I have a second spreadsheet that I send him at the same time. That one has every medical reimbursement request listed by date requested, date due, amount due, and a column of payments made.

At the bottom of that is a running tally of amount due minus amount paid, so he can see the amount remaining.

Once he zeros out (IF he zeros out) I will start over. Right now he's $3k in the hole.

Me: BS, 39
Him: WH, 44
Her: old, ugly, lonely, pathetic

Kids: my two reasons for getting through each day

Posts: 22 | Registered: Jun 2012
♀ 1330
Member # 1330
Default  Posted: 8:42 AM, June 19th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I scan and email him the receipt. Then I enter it onto an excel spreadsheet with the date sent, the total amount and the amount due me. When (if) it gets paid, I log the payment date and delete the amount owed me. This way, I keep a running total of what I have sent. The dates help if I have to go back and find the email where I sent him something.

I also keep a similar spreadsheet on summer custody, and I use the highlighting feature to indicate whether or not my ex is out of town on business or personal travel. This is going to be very helpful when we go back to court next month.

Remember to make all communications business-like and devoid of emotion. Write every email as if the judge will read it.


FBS: Married 20 years, 2 daughters 27 and 24. Divorced by the grace of GOD.
D-Days: 2/23/93; 10/11/97; 3/5/03
Ex & OW Broke up 12-10
"An erection does not count as personal growth."

Posts: 31339 | Registered: Apr 2003 | From: Massachusetts
♂ 32258
Member # 32258
Default  Posted: 8:55 AM, June 19th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks for this post. I just started my own excel spreadsheet this morning to track expense, CS, Daycare payments, etc and was wondering if it would be a good idea. I tend to go overboard with excel files but many of you have responded that excel files are the way to go.

D-day 5/24/11
BH = Me
2 children
The first true sense of calm I felt in YEARS was when I filed for D...
Divorced 9/2/14 and loving life!

Posts: 2224 | Registered: May 2011 | From: VA
♀ 36883
Member # 36883
Default  Posted: 9:29 AM, June 19th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

um, i think i made it more work then I thought I had.

So basically - if we got a reciept from BM (bio-mom) I would scan it as a PDF and put it into our file - file name ReciptUnpaid. Then I would write the check, make a copy of said check, then mail it out. ON the copy of the check I would put the mailed on date, then scan that and add it to the file.

Once the check was cashed (either by her or the Med company) then I would print out the notice from the bank and scan and put that into the file and change the file name to ReceiptPaid(date).

BM was NOTORIOUS for claiming we never paid her back or paid our part of any bills, so basically this was the only way that I could keep things straight. And if she disputed stuff, then I had a paper trail of ever step to show the court "here is our proof that we paid it"

It got her more then once because she never came with proof and I am pretty much a paper trail nazi when it comes to my life. Hell, i still have paystubs from my very first job

When we would need paid from her, I used our Quicken and invoiced her lol.

Me: 32 MH
Him: 39 MH
New online find 6/19/14 - shit
Phone Find 11/21/14 - I can't even right now.
1/26/15 - Started IC for me, DH won't go.

Posts: 2393 | Registered: Sep 2012
♀ 39204
Member # 39204
Default  Posted: 9:30 AM, June 19th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Due to contentious nature of our divorce (insert ex lying consistently during discovery) our judge COURT ORDERED that we can only communicate through OurFamilyWizard.

It has been a godsend for me. Everything is date and time stamped, he can not delete any messages and if needed we can give our lawyers or judge access to read all communication between us.

It does cost $99 a year but so worth it. Although my ex did refuse to use it for almost 4 months (a control thing for him). Lets just say the judge at our recent court appearance was not too happy that he was going against court orders.

Me. - moving on and upward !!!

Posts: 102 | Registered: May 2013 | From: Great Britain
Member # 29410
Default  Posted: 4:40 PM, June 19th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Because he likes to play a little game where reimbursements are late and not for the correct amount,

Oh my! My X did this, too! Totally random amounts, odd digits down to the pennies, two of them for a single requested sum of expenses. And of course the amount the two totaled was short. I had to go to court to get that fixed, among other things. When he does things like that to confuse the issue, I call it "muddying the water". He loves that game. It works well for him!! .... except when there are spreadsheets...

Posts: 1617 | Registered: Aug 2010
♀ 3703
Member # 3703
Default  Posted: 5:43 PM, June 19th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I just type it up on Microsoft word, add it separately on a calculator, and email it to him with the total highlighted at the bottom.

BW - 40
DD - 7 years old
D-day OW#1 2/2004;D-day OW#2 5/2010
Marriages that start this way, stepping over the bodies of loved ones as the giddy couple walks down the aisle, are not likely to last.

Posts: 5491 | Registered: Mar 2004 | From: NY
Topic Posts: 11

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