Mind you, I have a pathological problem with secrets so my obsessive desire to shed light on everything may not be healthy.
If she went to the effort to warn your WH about OW, she would be curious to know the fall out.
Married for over 15 years
2 beautiful sons
You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them. Maya Angelou
And I'm happily R'ed and it has been almost 7 years for me. I would not hesitate if I thought there was somebody out there only too happy to tell me dirt on her. I know little about "the whore." She doesn't have facebook but if she did, I sure as hell would not block her. I'd find out whatever I could.
Or leave it in the past like a good, responsible victim of betrayal?
That is the thing. I'm not a victim, and other than the early weeks and months of trauma experienced because of being cheated on, this girl stands up, dusts off and becomes a non-victim. I am not impacted by worrying about whether the whore "takes space in my head." My head has lots of room for lots of things, and finding out more dirt on the whore would still, even now, give me satisfaction.
I mean, don't you already know this beez is cray cray?!?
(Sorry, you get "Jrazz-at-1am" slang)
[This message edited by Jrazz at 3:00 AM, June 20th (Thursday)]
How can these OW's get men to do this crazy shit? The OW in our situation got several different men to call me to try to get my FWH's cell phone number and to get information in general. These are grown ass men, not teenagers! And, OW is no beauty.
I recently called the first ex-husband of the OW. I needed information, and he is one of the men that OW had call me to get FWH's phone number (after their affair was over, but before I knew about it). I am 3 years post d-day and I am so glad I made that call. It confirmed what I thought, gave me some new info and shed new light on just how evil the OW was. I just wish I had made the call earlier.
BTW, Bobbi_sue is spot on!
"Oh, why do my actions have consequences?" ~ Homer Simpson
"She knew my one weakness: That I'm weak!" ~ Homer Simpson
2 kids, 2 different dads, and no contact with them, something not right. WH is a dad to her 10 yr old son. While our children have been abandoned by him.
OW has done stuff that I have found out, discovered many lies which I informed WH of, but alas he is still with her.
I have never met her nor do I want to but my opinion of her is dead on, and some of my opinion has been based on stuff WH has told me about her too.
Find out what info this woman has, for your own protection!!!
I don't trust the OW in my situation and am quite prepared to get a restraining order if I need one. She grew up "on the wrong side of town" so I am sure she has connections, dont trust it one bit
..that feeling you get in your stomach, when you heart's broken. It's like all the butterflies just died.