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Newest Member: LoveNougat (46019)

User Topic: Question about eHarmony
OnceInALifetime
♂ 26023
Member # 26023
Question  Posted: 9:35 AM, June 21st (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I decided to give this site a shot, and just signed up. Went to send a message to a potential match last evening, and the default seems to be to initiate things by sending 5 questions from a list of canned questions.

The "guided communication" seems stiff and elementary-school like to me, so I instead jumped straight to email and sent her a message.

For you eHarmony users, do you like the guided communication? Does a guy who wants to jump straight to email seem overly pushy?

The woman I messaged accepted my request for email, which eHarmony played up as her being just about ready to marry me, but she did not write me a response. I'm not sure what proper (or expected) protocol is. The ball is still firmly in her court, right?


BH, now divorced

Posts: 3012 | Registered: Oct 2009
cayc
♀ 21964
Member # 21964
Default  Posted: 10:24 AM, June 21st (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The ball is still firmly in her court, right?

Uh, no. No, the ball is firmly in YOUR court. You asked permission to email her. She said yes. Now you are supposed to email her.


"I'm not afraid of storms, for I'm learning how to sail my ship." - Louisa May Alcott

Posts: 3200 | Registered: Dec 2008 | From: Mexico
little turtle
♀ 15584
Member # 15584
Default  Posted: 10:26 AM, June 21st (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I think you should write her an email since you sent the request for email. Just like when you ask for a person's phone number, it's then up to you to use it.


Failure is success if we learn from it.

Posts: 4247 | Registered: Aug 2007 | From: michigan
OnceInALifetime
♂ 26023
Member # 26023
Default  Posted: 11:37 AM, June 21st (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

The way it works, I send an email. That notifies her that an email was sent to her by me. She then chooses whether or not to permit email communication with me. If she permits it, then she can read the contents of my email, and I'm notified that email communication with her is now open.

So, that makes me think the ball's in her court. But it's all a little vague. Haven't figured out the workings of this dating site yet.


BH, now divorced

Posts: 3012 | Registered: Oct 2009
Amazonia
♀ 32810
Member # 32810
Default  Posted: 11:42 AM, June 21st (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I would say the ball is in her court, since she has read your email and can choose to respond or not. But I've never used eHarm, so I'm not familiar with all their guided comm, etc.


"You yourself deserve your love and affection as much as anybody in the universe." -Buddha
"Let's face it, life is a crap shoot." -Sad in AZ

Posts: 13926 | Registered: Jul 2011
little turtle
♀ 15584
Member # 15584
Default  Posted: 3:57 PM, June 21st (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh, I see. So you sent her an email and she decided to read it? In that case, yes, it's up to her to respond to the email or not.


Failure is success if we learn from it.

Posts: 4247 | Registered: Aug 2007 | From: michigan
Topic Posts: 6

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