Cookies are required for login or registration. Please read and agree to our cookie policy to continue.

Newest Member: Ganon27

General :
Can I just say - SI Saved. My. Life. !!

This Topic is Archived
default

 ZenMumWalking (original poster member #25341) posted at 8:44 PM on Friday, June 21st, 2013

I guess I am an 'old-timer'. DDay Dec 2008. Joined SI Aug 2009. Limbo for ... idk ... YEARS. Have been S since before x-mas.

Off the deep end a few times after that.

Including a few times where I truly thought I. WOULD. D.I.E.

Fortunately - FORTUNATELY!! - I reached out to you all here - SI. Was advised that I was depressed, find a psych dr. Not as easy as it should be in this country, but I reached out and found someone. Am on meds (zoloft and mirtazipine to be exact). Am actually SLEEPING at night now - for the first time in I don't know how many years. Have even had a few good days - yes that's right, not 'not bad days' but bona fide GOOD DAYS.

IDK if we will end up R or S or D. Right now, that's not what matters.

Right now, I know - I KNOW - I would not be alive without you all at SI. I was circling the drain, tanking BIG TIME, had a suicide plan with a pretty high lethality rate. But I reached out. To you all here.

Thank you so much.

As I said - I still don't know what the future holds, but what I DO know if that there would not even BE a future without the SI Army.

Thank you all so much.

For those of you who are new, who are hurting, who have come up against DD # xyz - please do not give up hope. There are SO MANY people here who understand. Who care. Who will hold your hand and help you to navigate the rollercoaster, the shit sandwich you have been dealt.

((((SI))))

Me (BS), Him (WH): late-50's
3 DS: 26, 25, 22
M: 30+ (19 1/2 at Dday)
Dday: Dec 2008
Wanted R, not gonna happen (in permanent S)
Used to be DeadMumWalking, doing better now

posts: 8533   ·   registered: Aug. 28th, 2009   ·   location: EU
id 6382890
default

MovingUpward ( member #14866) posted at 8:46 PM on Friday, June 21st, 2013

Glad to hear that things are looking up.

((((DeadMumWalking))))

posts: 54450   ·   registered: Jun. 4th, 2007
id 6382892
default

 ZenMumWalking (original poster member #25341) posted at 8:50 PM on Friday, June 21st, 2013

Thanks for the support Moo, and all the good work that you and all the guides and mods (and admins) at SI do. We are all truly blessed!!

Me (BS), Him (WH): late-50's
3 DS: 26, 25, 22
M: 30+ (19 1/2 at Dday)
Dday: Dec 2008
Wanted R, not gonna happen (in permanent S)
Used to be DeadMumWalking, doing better now

posts: 8533   ·   registered: Aug. 28th, 2009   ·   location: EU
id 6382900
default

JanaGreen ( member #29341) posted at 8:50 PM on Friday, June 21st, 2013

So happy to hear you got help and are doing well. (((((HUGS)))))

posts: 9505   ·   registered: Aug. 17th, 2010   ·   location: Southeast US
id 6382901
default

caregiver9000 ( member #28622) posted at 8:53 PM on Friday, June 21st, 2013

(((DMW)))

Whoooo HOOOOO!!!! Good days!!

Love it. Glad you have good days to trot out and celebrate.

I am so glad that you were here and found support to pull you from the "drain."

Whatever the future holds, you sound better prepared to handle it.

Me: fortysomething, independent, happy,
XH "Stretch" (and Skew!) ;)
two kids, teens. Old enough I am truly NO CONTACT w/ NPD zebraduck
S 5/2010
D 12/2012

posts: 7063   ·   registered: May. 27th, 2010   ·   location: a better place
id 6382903
default

 ZenMumWalking (original poster member #25341) posted at 8:54 PM on Friday, June 21st, 2013

Thanks ((((JanaGreen))))

I wouldn't say I'm completely out of the woods yet, but I am doing so much better. I TRULY forgot how GOOD life could be.

What's more: I don't see how I would have been able to come out of the darkness without SI. I have had so much love and support, and such strong, practical advice from here.

Me (BS), Him (WH): late-50's
3 DS: 26, 25, 22
M: 30+ (19 1/2 at Dday)
Dday: Dec 2008
Wanted R, not gonna happen (in permanent S)
Used to be DeadMumWalking, doing better now

posts: 8533   ·   registered: Aug. 28th, 2009   ·   location: EU
id 6382907
default

 ZenMumWalking (original poster member #25341) posted at 8:56 PM on Friday, June 21st, 2013

((((cg))))

Yes, things are really better. And you are SO RIGHT. Whatever the future holds - WHATEVER - I am better prepared to deal with it.

I look forward to giving (and getting where necessary) support in the future.

Me (BS), Him (WH): late-50's
3 DS: 26, 25, 22
M: 30+ (19 1/2 at Dday)
Dday: Dec 2008
Wanted R, not gonna happen (in permanent S)
Used to be DeadMumWalking, doing better now

posts: 8533   ·   registered: Aug. 28th, 2009   ·   location: EU
id 6382909
default

NoTriangles ( member #35985) posted at 11:06 PM on Friday, June 21st, 2013

Hi Mum!

I remember your story and am so glad to hear you are feeling better!!

You DO have a future and it can be whatever you want it to be!

Me: Finding my SunlightHim: Traitor in my FoxholeLet go or get dragged.

posts: 1260   ·   registered: Jun. 30th, 2012   ·   location: a state of consciousness
id 6383058
default

 ZenMumWalking (original poster member #25341) posted at 11:11 PM on Friday, June 21st, 2013

Thanks so much ((((NoTriangles))))

Sometimes I feel strong enough to help others, other times I have been to the very depths of despair and reach out here for help.

Thanks for the good wishes, it helps me beyond measure that the SI peeps are here rooting for me!

Me (BS), Him (WH): late-50's
3 DS: 26, 25, 22
M: 30+ (19 1/2 at Dday)
Dday: Dec 2008
Wanted R, not gonna happen (in permanent S)
Used to be DeadMumWalking, doing better now

posts: 8533   ·   registered: Aug. 28th, 2009   ·   location: EU
id 6383061
default

Jrazz ( member #31349) posted at 11:17 PM on Friday, June 21st, 2013

(((DMW)))

I know you've helped many people as well. I'm so glad that you're on such a positive track.

"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." - Deeply Scared's mom

posts: 29076   ·   registered: Feb. 28th, 2011   ·   location: California
id 6383065
default

metamorphisis ( member #12041) posted at 11:44 PM on Friday, June 21st, 2013

This made me teary. Happy tears. It's so important what we all do for each other here and makes me feel good to be a part of it.

Go softly my sweet friend. You will always be a part of who I am.

posts: 52157   ·   registered: Sep. 14th, 2006
id 6383086
default

Spelljean ( member #35624) posted at 12:23 AM on Saturday, June 22nd, 2013

You have posted so much helpful advice for me throughout this past 10 months. You along with so many others here have saved me too!

WH: 41
me: BS, 45
Together 18 1/2 years, married 17
DDAY 8/2/12
OW: EA- friend of 4 months
Status: separated

posts: 1037   ·   registered: May. 21st, 2012   ·   location: California
id 6383123
default

bufffalo ( member #21854) posted at 4:40 AM on Saturday, June 22nd, 2013

Atta girl...keep it up.

Bufffalo

DDay 9/25/2008

BH-me

posts: 6172   ·   registered: Dec. 1st, 2008   ·   location: Texas
id 6383353
default

gonnabe2016 ( member #34823) posted at 4:48 AM on Saturday, June 22nd, 2013

You may feel that you have 'gotten', DMW....but you have also given just as much.

You are one that has been posting to my threads since day 1...no matter how ridiculous I sounded.

I think that you are amazing and you have a special place in the world. I'm glad that your 'lethal' plan fell by the wayside. What an incredible loss that would have been!

You are you...and that makes you special. I'm glad that you are starting to see light, DMW. You deserve to feel happiness, you are worth it.

eta: PS....the *eyes* were depicting some of my stupid posts and my incredible stubborn-ness at going NC w/ Sultan against your (and everyone else's advice). Not YOU for posting to me!

[This message edited by gonnabe2016 at 10:51 PM, June 21st (Friday)]

"Oh, what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive." - Sir Walter Scott

In my effort to be *concise*, I often come off as blunt and harsh. Sorry, don't mean to be offensive.

posts: 9241   ·   registered: Feb. 15th, 2012   ·   location: Midwest
id 6383359
smile1

nolight ( member #32785) posted at 5:20 AM on Saturday, June 22nd, 2013

I'm so happy to hear this DMW remember though the strength to get you to where you are is yours, you should be so proud at the way you have pulled yourself through.

We make our own fortunes and call them fate, and what better excuse to choose a path then to insist it's our destiny.

posts: 610   ·   registered: Jul. 14th, 2011
id 6383379
This Topic is Archived
Cookies on SurvivingInfidelity.com®

SurvivingInfidelity.com® uses cookies to enhance your visit to our website. This is a requirement for participants to login, post and use other features. Visitors may opt out, but the website will be less functional for you.

v.1.001.20250404a 2002-2025 SurvivingInfidelity.com® All Rights Reserved. • Privacy Policy