I am married to an EU (emotional Unavailable) man which led to M problems which led to prostitutes, which led to me needing an emotional man in my life. But I don't have one!
He never comes up to kiss me, hold me, asks about my day, does things for me. Nothing. But when I initiate these things he doesn't pull back either, he accepts them and then will reciprocate. It just doesn't occur to him to do these things!
When I tell him what I need he will listen, but no action takes place. It is quite exasperating. I don't know if I can live like this anymore. I want to feel special and he doesn't make me feel that way. He doesn't even say I love you although I know he cares.
My IC say's he can't change much because that is who he is. I'm so depressed about that.
He is not a bad person. He gives me financial support, doesn't abuse me physically. We donít fight. He does everything I ask him to do. He just can't deal with emotions and has a hard time talking about them. I do have to say after the infidelity he has made an effort to share feelings. He even once or twice kissed me, and did ask me about my day. I told him how much that meant to me.
At one time I decided not to touch, hug, kiss, talk emotional, do little things for him, etc... and see if he noticed. I went four days of none of this before I broke down and did what I Always do, be the one who initiates these things. I feel so sad. I donít know what to do about it. Live with it or go?
I have to admit feeling a little jealous when reading what some of your SO does for you, the emails, notes, flowers, gifts, words of endearmentÖ I want that in my life now, but I keep thinking of that is who he is and I have to find my needs met in a different way, he is a different type of person.