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His latest gem - wants new mother in law to pick up my son

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lostmommy posted 6/27/2013 15:21 PM

I swear sometimes I think I'm the crazy one. On alternate weekends, my father takes J to the train station to meet XWH, who then takes him home to NJ. Today, it's my job to do the drop-off because my father has somewhere to be and can't do the drive. So I told XWH last night that it was going to be me at drop-off, and that I'd do my best to get there so that they can make the 5:40 train, but I don't get out of work until 5 and I had to go home, get J, and then get to the train station.

This morning he suggested that his new MIL come to my parent's house to pick up our son. That would be OW's mother. Um... am I the only one that sees something wrong with this picture?? I texted my dad this morning and posed the question to him, told him I was inclined to say no, and he agreed with my decision.

I told XWH that I appreciated the offer but that wasn't a viable option and I'd be at the train station as soon as I could so they could make that train. He wants to know why it's not a viable option. Do I really need to explain myself??? Is it just me???

Kajem posted 6/27/2013 15:29 PM

you don't NEED to explain yourself. But you could tell him your parents and you are uncomfortable with that situation.

Truth is you don't know this woman from any crazy child kidnapper. No reason to hand your child off to someone you do not know. That's the explanation... you - nor your parents know this person and don't feel comfortable handing J off to them.

I would expect him to feel the same way about anyone HE doesn't know wanting to come and get J from him.

Good luck.


betrayedfriend posted 6/27/2013 15:30 PM

I'd be inclined to say, that my parents have no inclination to meet or trust their grandson's safety with the mother of the woman who wrecked their family. That being said, it's not the "nicest" thing to say and really unless her mother is a whore too, then there's little connection with mother and daughter in terms of the daughter's decisions...

fraeuken posted 6/27/2013 15:35 PM

Ah, NO! And no, you don't have to explain yourself. As

Kajem said, you don't know anything about this woman. She could be a bad driver, an alcoholic, on medication - you name it and you should not have to explain why you don't want your child to be transported by a complete stranger.

lostmommy posted 6/27/2013 15:40 PM

I'm pretty sure she's crazy/has issues as the OW/new wife doesn't even have a good relationship with her. Why the thought even occurred to him is beyond me.

[This message edited by lostmommy at 3:41 PM, June 27th (Thursday)]

lostmommy posted 6/27/2013 18:01 PM

Well the drop-off happened so quickly because there was an impatient person behind me, so there were no further questions about his MIL. I wouldn't be surprised if he brings it up on Sunday when I pick-up.

welcome14 posted 6/27/2013 19:57 PM

I agree with not wanting a stranger to pick up my child, but maybe the ow doesn't have a good relationship with her because ow is a slut and crazy and her mom doesn't approve? Cause you know the NPDs always make it the normal one's fault. Is there anyone that knows her that could answer that? And maybe you could stipulate that you have to meet and approve of anyone that will be doing drop-offs? Maybe a letter from your attorney stating that? Good luck, hopefully your dad will be able to do the drop off in the future and this will be a non-issue.

tabitha95 posted 6/27/2013 21:25 PM

If OW doesn't have a good relationship with her mother, why is it a viable solution to your EX?

lostmommy posted 6/28/2013 12:55 PM

I have friends in the firehouse that they all used to belong to and those friends tell me the whole family is nutso [with examples]. XH is in good company, because he's completely off his rocker as well. I wish I could keep my son from all of them, but I can't unless or until they do something to him.

damncutekitty posted 6/29/2013 10:58 AM

It doesn't matter whose mom she is, he should NOT be asking you to hand off your precious child to some stranger you do not know or trust. Period.

Mousse242 posted 6/30/2013 18:23 PM

Not a blood relative. Period. End of discussion.

lostmommy posted 6/30/2013 20:12 PM

Luckily it didn't come up in conversation at pick-up today either.

homewrecked2011 posted 6/30/2013 20:41 PM

Also,if you start now with all this changing of things, it gets more difficult later on. Stick with the set up you have now, and that's true that this woman isn't a blood relative.

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