@ladies_first: You are right. I need a good nights sleep. I will be seeing my therapist today. I never heard of HALT! I will add that to my coping skills tool belt ~ thank you!
@peridot: He has just the pension which I am entitled to 35%. As far as the tuition, I have asked that he pay for half but he refuses to do so. He didn't do it last year and he's not doing it this year either. I guess I can file a separate motion but if he can't just do the right thing ... then whatever.
I really really really hope all his lies catch up to him.
@soverybetrayed: In my state and with stbx's pension, I can't request QDRO. I've tried and tried.
Yes, we have been married for over 19 years. I know I am entitled to SS but what is the point? I would rather every dime go to the kids not me. He won't even support his kids (other than CS) so I know he won't support me.
Thank you so much for "listening"!! I didn't get a good nights sleep so I am not going to make any big decisions BUT I am SERIOUSLY considering writing a letter listing what he owes me and saying"
"Every word you have said and every thing that you've written are lies and every thing that you have done since you walked out has been despicable. Maybe you did it to get back at me for whatever wrong you feel I have done to you. Your actions did hurt me but hurt your children even more. I've done my best to shield them from your lies and actions because I still hope that one day they will want to rebuild a relationship with you.
You feel that this is about the money but it is about the principle. It's about being accountable. It's about taking responsibility. Everything I have is for my children. Whatever amount you choose to pay back, will benefit them and not me.
I am going to list what you rightfully owe me and you decide what you are going to do. Do what you feel is right and fair.
1. Car loan $
2. Children's tuition $
3. Uncovered medical expenses $
4. Joint VISA bill $
I want you to leave me alone. Do not file anymore false police reports. Do not show up at the children's school. Do not come in to my home. Do not illegally claim the children on your taxes. Do not blame me for the lack of relationship you have with the kids.
How do I add this to the letter: MAN THE FUCK UP!