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Newest Member: Phoenix2rise (45723)

User Topic: DD has an eating disorder
letitout
♀ 38288
Member # 38288
Default  Posted: 2:48 PM, June 29th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My 17 yo DD has an eating disorder. It started about 2 years ago (same time as WH cheating, coincidence?) But first she was anorexic for a year, then this past year binge eating. She just got out of an inpatient eating disorder clinic. Doing ok so far, but I wonder if any of you have a child with an eating disorder and how you handle it. We've been to family therapy a few times, but with schedules and money we discontinued.


BW 55, WH 64
2 years of prostitutes.

Posts: 283 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: California
jo2love
♀ 31528
Member # 31528
Default  Posted: 4:54 PM, June 29th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((DD & letitout)))

I haven't been through this, but wanted to send hugs and strength.


Posts: 36451 | Registered: Mar 2011
authenticnow
♀ 16024
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 6:00 PM, June 29th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((((letitout and DD)))))

I would like to send hugs also.

I think continued therapy is very important, if there is any way you can swing it.

I'll be sending good thoughts.


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 38662 | Registered: Sep 2007
nowiknow23
♀ 33226
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 7:29 PM, June 29th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((hugs)))) I have not had this issue in my family, but I do have a friend who is going through it with her 17 yo daughter. Continued therapy is so key to successful recovery.


You can call me NIK

"Keep your face always toward the sunshine - and shadows will fall behind you."
-Walt Whitman


Posts: 26166 | Registered: Aug 2011
letitout
♀ 38288
Member # 38288
Default  Posted: 8:50 AM, June 30th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks for your support and advise. I know we need to get into family therapy, and DD was going to IC for a while, I'm in IC, my H may be in IC, and MC will be starting soon. It's a bit overwhelming and expensive. But you know, you do what you half to do.


BW 55, WH 64
2 years of prostitutes.

Posts: 283 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: California
movingforward777
♀ 6850
Member # 6850
Default  Posted: 8:04 PM, June 30th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I went through this with my older sister....she became anorexic when her marriage ended due to infidelity.
She was painfully thin, but would not eat....it was the only thing she felt she could control in her life was what she did or did not eat....everything else seemed to be spinning out of control for her....
We worked with her to help her reach a point where she felt she had a little better grip on things, but when she wanted to start eating again everything she ate came right back up again....
It took a long time, a lot of love and patience and some counselling for her to get her to a point where she was a healthy weight again.
To this day she stops eating if stressed or upset and her weight plummets down to a dangerously low number....
He current husband is loving, patient and keeps a close eye on her eating and exercise routine...he will call her on it if he sees that she is dropping weight, and brings it to all of our attention so we can work with him to help her stay healthy....
It is a very difficult thing to watch, and can do so much damage to their bodies while they are not eating properly/at all....hang in there with your daughter and keep her honest about what she is eating, how much she is exercising, if she is binging/vomitting....when it is a secret it easy for them to get very far off track....HUGS


You can't reach for anything new if your hands are still full of yesterday's junk.......Louise Smith

Posts: 4845 | Registered: Apr 2005 | From: Ontario
tushnurse
♀ 21101
Member # 21101
Default  Posted: 7:53 AM, July 1st (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((letitout, and DD)))
As you probably already know this is a similar disorder to cutting, and OCD. It takes a lot of vigilance, and constant follow up. I have also seen that it can rear its ugly head again anytime that person is under extreme stress.

Learning and consistently implementing other ways of managing the stress is key.

I personally do not have a child with an eating disorder, but my oldest niece walks a fine line with this. She was worse in high school, dancer, athlete, honor student, perfect GPA, on and on. She would tend to have very strange eating habits, now she is getting ready to start her sophomore year of college, and lives on her own. Her eating habits have improved, still eats very clean, lots of fresh fruit, veggies, and only very lean protein. No Fast food, no junk (unless you count pretzels). She also runs for her exercise and stress relief. She looks pretty darn healthy at this time, and I think her learning to accept that it's ok to not be perfect in every aspect of life has helped her more than anything.

Good luck to you guys.


Me: FBS
Him: FWS
Kids: 15 & 17
Married for 22 years now, was 16 at the time. .
D-Day Sept 26 2008
Fully R'd, and Happy Happy Happy

Posts: 8789 | Registered: Oct 2008 | From: St. Louis
letitout
♀ 38288
Member # 38288
Default  Posted: 9:05 AM, July 1st (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Moving Forward: I'm so glad that your sister has so much support. I know that is crucial to recovery and relapse. Stress for her was a big factor, but you wouldn't know it. I am not anorexic but already was thin and became very underweight due to the stress of infidelity and looked anorectic . That didn't help my DD situation.

One of things we worked on in therapy is she needs to be open about when she is feeling out of control. We don't have family here and they don't know back "home". She has no girl friends, But she has our immediate family support.

Since she has been home for 3 weeks she got a boyfriend and he is the best therapy, and cheaper too! Only have to feed him! lol. He gives her all kinds of encouragement and likes her just the way she is. He really boosts her self esteem. She is overweight now due to the binge eating and doesn't purge.

I'm going to stay in IC. An absolute must for me. My DD IC we may be able to afford and can probably handle Family therapy, but my My WH IC and MC will have to wait. But I'm afraid to wait too long for those things because I don't want things to slip back to the way we were.

Tushnurce: Your nieces story is somewhat similar. DD made straight A's freshman year, cheerleader. Then all F's Junior year and then dropped out of high school. She is now on an online school trying to make up credits but it's slow going.

She never left the house when she was binge eating. Ever. For about a year. Wouldn't accept help. We were ready to call the police to come and pick her up for treatment when she finally let us take her. When she was anorexic she exercised insensibly. Her diet was very strange. Didn't put anything in her mouth that wasn't "healthy" and it was a mono diet, meaning she ate very few types of food over and over.

The thing of it was I am a Dietitian and couldn't stop her from harming herself. It was very heart breaking to watch. she also many years ago was diagnosed with OCD, and currently on an antidepressant which she wouldn't take before treatment because she thought it was harming her body.

So, to end with, I am dealing with the infidelity, DD eating disorder and a DS who is on meds for depression. I am also was severely depressed and on meds. But these stories are best left to another post.

Thanks for your support.


BW 55, WH 64
2 years of prostitutes.

Posts: 283 | Registered: Jan 2013 | From: California
movingforward777
♀ 6850
Member # 6850
Default  Posted: 2:22 PM, July 1st (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

((((letitout))))

I will keep you and your D in my thoughts and prayers...HUGS


You can't reach for anything new if your hands are still full of yesterday's junk.......Louise Smith

Posts: 4845 | Registered: Apr 2005 | From: Ontario
Topic Posts: 9

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