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Woulda, coulda and shoulda

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 sunflowergirl30 (original poster member #28979) posted at 5:16 PM on Sunday, June 30th, 2013

If I knew then what I know now. I would have run the first time I met wh. Him cheating...it was inevitable. The more I look back..I realize all the red flags and signs of his weak character and lack of integrity. I see how he has disrespected me repeatedly over the 20yrs I have known him. How he has been a hypocrite and held me to a certain standard but not himself. His boundaries are a joke. I read this somewhere...

" a weak man is only as faithful as his options"

That sums it up in a nutshell. He is a dry drunk and a dry cheater. If he's not obsessing about one thing its another.

He continues to do even the smallest stupidest things even after I tell them how much they trigger me. Doesn't matter how innocent they seem or maybe. All the lies...the repeated betrayals and disrespect of me as a woman let alone as his wife and mother of his kids. Yet he is magically changed! LOFL....people in my real life lecture me on how they are tired of my sad sack face. Well, shit im so sorry im not good at being fake. People who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.

I guess this is a vent. Not asking for advice. Im NOT NEW to this.

I flip between anger and sadness at the drop of a hat. I sneak off to cry. Sit in a parking lot at the grocery store....and just cry. I get a text asking whats talking so long???

Life's a bitch and then you die...well fuck! I wish id die already.

First D-day May 2010, Last D-day Sept 2015. Filed for divorce Nov. 2015
Divorce final March 4, 2016

To many false R’s to mention. One to many affairs to list. Cheaters suck, suck the life right out of you, as they smile in your face..




posts: 1182   ·   registered: Jul. 6th, 2010   ·   location: Pacific Northwest
id 6392570
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SisterMilkshake ( member #30024) posted at 6:10 PM on Sunday, June 30th, 2013

(((sunflowergirl30))) I hope you are seriously working on an exit plan from this marriage.

[This message edited by SisterMilkshake at 4:46 PM, June 30th (Sunday)]

BW (me) & FWH both over half a century; married several decades; children
d-day 3/10; LTA (7 years?)

"Oh, why do my actions have consequences?" ~ Homer Simpson
"She knew my one weakness: That I'm weak." ~ Homer Simpson

posts: 15429   ·   registered: Nov. 5th, 2010   ·   location: The Great White North USA
id 6392624
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Jospehine85 ( member #35971) posted at 9:14 PM on Sunday, June 30th, 2013

No sunflowergirl30. You do not wish you would die.

F*ck WH and F*ck the OW. You can wish they die.

But you are going to move on away from them and have THE MOST FABULOUS life. Get out of that marriage. Move on. He is dragging you down and sapping the joy out of your life like a gigantic black hole.

Me - BS
WH - old
Kids
Dday May 2012

posts: 1598   ·   registered: Jun. 28th, 2012
id 6392783
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