Sorry if this post is rambling. I am kind of rushing to get it down while my feelings are still so fresh.
D-day was only May 7th, and so I am still in the ping pong stage of wanting to run versus wanting to try to work it out.
We are trying to stick it out one day at a time for right now.
WH has been remorseful right from the end of the first week, and it's only gotten better from there....
...but unfortunately, that is not really making me feel any better yet.
I told him tonight that it would be like if I had taken a crow bar to his knees and elbows and head, and THEN I realized just how much he meant to me and so I rushed him to the ER and begged them to save him....they did but now he will never be the same vibrant person that he once was...
...and HE decided that now that his life was a shadow of what it once was, that he will work through my anger with me because he loves me and he wants to try to accept what I just did to him.
WHY? We are both working our butts off as if our lives depend on it now, and so I can see some hope finally. I think that hope is making me even more angry. :(