i am knee deep in what is my first "A Season" It has been hell. I trigger constantly thinking about where my WH's head was last year at this time, the things he was doing.
my best advice to you is actions. Words mean nothing if there are no actions to back them up. SHOW true remorse in your actions. Be there for your BS, anticipate situations that may cause triggers and recognize it, acknowledge it. Own what you did and work to become the person your BS and family deserve. Forge new family memories...take a painful day and create a new memory with a new activity...step outside the box and do different things with your family.
you cant change what you did....but you can change who you become from here on out. talk to your BS, ask her what she needs from you. keep communicating, keep talking, be there and be supportive. Remember, understand and accept that here WILL be bad days for her...how you conduct yourself on those bad days will speak volumes.