It scared me. I got that withdrawing alone feeling like I used to get before and during the A and it really scared me. So he cooled off and apologized, I apologized. Then I did something revolutionary, I talked to him about it. We talked about what we were feeling. I told him about the fear. And we feel closer because of it.
We're going to be ok. He was actually singing around the house the other day. It made me tear up. He used to sing all the time early in our relationship but hasn't for a very long time. It's so good to hear him sing even if it's hard rock music and he gets the lyrics wrong.
[This message edited by knightsbff at 10:16 AM, July 2nd (Tuesday)]
I edit often to fix stuff ☺️
Profoundly grateful Every. Single. Day. that I am blessed with an H with strength, integrity, and compassion, and that he decided to try.
I have to say, I feel that Crazz and I have the most progress when we handle an argument productively.
Seems like an odd litmus test, but whatever works, right?
Good for you for talking about it. I hope that the good feeling you're left with encourages you to talk more things out.
Then I did something revolutionary, I talked to him about it. We talked about what we were feeling. I told him about the fear
It's so good to here him sing even if it's hard rock music and he gets the lyrics wrong.
I was groomed to say, "Yes, you're right. I'm wrong. I'm sorry." and back away from the argument.
Remember that talking after the mads passed and try to do that before the mads start.
Practice, practice, practice. That sounds weird, talk about stuff, all sorts of stuff. Pick a topic a day and talk about it. It helps a ton!
Wal and I listen to NPR and talk about the topics that come up. It was awkward at first. The more that we did it, the easier it became and now, we would really miss it if we didn't debate or agree and just chat about stuff.
ETA: It was so commonly mentioned that in concert on occasion Hendrix really would sing "'Scuse me while I kiss this guy."
[This message edited by aesir at 4:24 AM, July 2nd (Tuesday)]
Do not back up. Severe tire damage.
Divorced and remarried to XBH
So glad to hear you're able to express yourself KBFF and not hold it in... and then be able to discuss it together... progress indeed!!!