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lifestoshort (original poster member #18442) posted at 3:15 PM on Thursday, July 4th, 2013
im confused by the feelings Im flooded with cause I wanted the separation. but here i am, not able to talk to him or never said goodbye... and I am just overwhelmed by saddness, anxiety, anxiousness, pain, hurt, missing him.
why? counselor said its the normal rollercoaster and cause I have only been able to be strong or angry this whole time so now I cracked.
i just feel helpless right now cause I dont know if I will ever see or talk to him again. so in turn i get scared wondering if thats love when I really thought I had none prior.
Im just really scared. these feelings freek me out. and I dont like being not in control of me or even this situation. it feels really bad :(
Im 45. 1st H I left in 2001 after 3 kids. narcassist.
2nd exH had MANY affairs.FALSE R. cheats again. D 5/09. 2 kids. I got 100% custody. ex hasnt seen kids in 6 yrs.
2014 to now: dated highschool sweetheart. He cheated w 23 yr old & left.
Jennifer99 ( member #39551) posted at 4:34 PM on Thursday, July 4th, 2013
Been there. Be patient and kind with yourself. Acknowledge that feelings will come and you can't control them, only what you do with them. Wait and see what you feel like later. I don't know what "normal" is but I went through the same thing and on a really weird timeline. IC says because I was trying to be too strong and not honor my feelings.
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