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Funeral Etiquette

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 mysticpenguin (original poster member #38839) posted at 12:30 AM on Saturday, July 6th, 2013

Should you always attend a funeral with your SO even if you did not know the person who is deceased?

[This message edited by mysticpenguin at 10:15 PM, October 19th (Saturday)]

Betrayed

posts: 306   ·   registered: Mar. 29th, 2013
id 6398516
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Nature_Girl ( member #32554) posted at 12:55 AM on Saturday, July 6th, 2013

I would go.

Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU

posts: 10722   ·   registered: Jun. 21st, 2011   ·   location: USA
id 6398535
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hemademesingle ( member #21281) posted at 12:56 AM on Saturday, July 6th, 2013

I think that it is totally appropriate for you to attend with your husband, offering him support, it's hard losing someone from your "age bracket", makes one examine there own mortality

posts: 466   ·   registered: Oct. 16th, 2008   ·   location: Canada
id 6398536
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 mysticpenguin (original poster member #38839) posted at 1:11 AM on Saturday, July 6th, 2013

Thanks ladies!

[This message edited by mysticpenguin at 10:16 PM, October 19th (Saturday)]

Betrayed

posts: 306   ·   registered: Mar. 29th, 2013
id 6398555
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MoreThanMe ( member #25451) posted at 1:10 PM on Saturday, July 6th, 2013

Someone once told me- "if you are thinking whether or not you should go to a funeral-you should go."

Brevity, typos & misspellings provided by my ipad and fatigue.
It's been 4 years, SA husband sober. We're doing okay. Today.

fWH had ONS with High School Principal he met on Ashley.com. 08/25/2009

posts: 705   ·   registered: Sep. 6th, 2009
id 6398882
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authenticnow ( member #16024) posted at 7:55 PM on Saturday, July 6th, 2013

I don't think you should worry about others will think. And one of my pet peeves is someone telling you how you will feel. You get to decide that. If you're not worried about feeling awkward, your H shouldn't be.

I don't think it's ever wrong to be there as a support for your partner.

DS, you are forever in my heart. Thank you for sharing your beautiful spirit with me. I will always try to live by the example you have set. I love you and miss you every day and am sorry you had to go so soon, it just doesn't seem fair.

posts: 55165   ·   registered: Sep. 2nd, 2007
id 6399171
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Rollercoaster ( member #1298) posted at 5:02 AM on Sunday, July 7th, 2013

My husband went to a funeral with me today and neither one of us knew the deceased!! She was the wife of a guy who delivers to the company I work for (so I know HIM). I just felt like I should pay my respects for HIM. And hubby volunteered to go with me and we were both glad we went. Go. :)

Me BS 59, WS 59
Reconciled

posts: 4061   ·   registered: Mar. 26th, 2003   ·   location: California
id 6399592
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Nature_Girl ( member #32554) posted at 5:17 AM on Sunday, July 7th, 2013

Based on what you said he said, I think even more strongly that you should go.

Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU

posts: 10722   ·   registered: Jun. 21st, 2011   ·   location: USA
id 6399605
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itainteasy ( member #31094) posted at 5:09 PM on Monday, July 8th, 2013

My friend's father passed away last week...and my fiance came to the funeral home with me, even though he never met the deceased, and doesn't know my friend that well.

I told him he didn't have to come, and he said "YOU knew him, and you know her, and you are hurting, and I want to support you."

I was happy he came. I appreciated his support.

posts: 3446   ·   registered: Feb. 4th, 2011   ·   location: NWPA
id 6400727
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lynnm1947 ( member #15300) posted at 8:20 PM on Monday, July 8th, 2013

Am I the only cynical person who thinks maybe there's an underhanded reason why he doesn't want you to attend with him--like maybe he'd like to get up to something with some other grade-school friend?

Age: 64..ummmmmmm, no...............65....no...oh, hell born in 1947. You figure it out!

"I could have missed the pain, but I would have had to miss the dance." Garth Brooks

posts: 8765   ·   registered: Jul. 11th, 2007   ·   location: Toronto, Canada
id 6400972
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itainteasy ( member #31094) posted at 2:35 PM on Tuesday, July 9th, 2013

^Nope.

posts: 3446   ·   registered: Feb. 4th, 2011   ·   location: NWPA
id 6401786
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movingforward777 ( member #6850) posted at 5:41 PM on Tuesday, July 9th, 2013

I would look at it as an opportunity to meet some of the people from that "other circle" with your H.....

It is never out of line to extend sympathies to others when they have suffered a loss....I know I would want my other half with me.....sorry for his loss....HUGS

You can't reach for anything new if your hands are still full of yesterday's junk.......Louise Smith

posts: 4877   ·   registered: Apr. 9th, 2005   ·   location: Ontario
id 6402060
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