Dday was one month ago, so time for an update.
The rollercoaster ride for me continues. During the evening I usually feel better, more positive. Mornings suck. Every morning I wake up depressed. I usually always dream about my WW returning to our M. Then I awake to reality. Really sucks.
WW is displaying almost bipolar emotions. One moment she's nice and polite, next she's mean and hostile. She tries to bait me into arguing about the same old stuff that happened years ago. I'm no longer taking the bait, telling her we've already discussed that, and I'm not going to argue with her. I usually then hang up the phone.
We talk on the phone, but never face to face. When we are home at the same time, there's no discussion, nothing. You can feel the tension at home.
WW's A continues. Today she admitted they were "seeing" each other. I'm fairly certain they've only physically seen each other on three occasions. I know they are texting and calling each other daily.
WW continues to state our M is over, and I've pretty much relocated myself to that fact. We've both retained attorneys. Mine is provided free through my police union, her mom is paying for hers.
I've opened my own checking account and put some money in each. Somehow she knows this, (cant't figure out how she learned about this, have everything sent to my PO box).
I've told my WW several times she needs to move out. She's stated she's not moving out until a seperation agreement is agreed upon. WW has agreed to "spend the nights" with her friend or her mom, but will not move out.
All of this continues to take a toll on our son. He's still not sleeping well.
I continue to try to implement the 180 as best I can. Trying to take things day by day.