SurvivingInfidelity.com Forum Archives

sunshine226 posted 7/9/2013 06:35 AM

I told him that its time to make it official, to end our relationship, that I know he's not coming back despite saying he is (if he was, he would be back by now)

He moved in with OW the day after i found out about the A, but he kept telling me he loved me and was coming back, i held on all this time, waiting and hoping, not accepting that the man I just spent almost 23 years with would choose OW over me and his kids

He kept coming back and forth until 3 months ago when I told him that I dont want to see him anymore as long as she is a part of his life, so havent seen him since March 22, he hasnt been in to see his daughter, has never seen his 4 month old grandchild and has seen DS once in the last year and a half

I finally got the courage to say it is over (and mean it, have said it before) but this time, it is over, I love him but hate what he has done to us, but I need to accept it for what it really is. He wants to be with OW, not me, not his family, not our new home, not his life

He has a new life, a new family, and its time for me to move on officially. Its time to let go of the hope that he is coming back

itainteasy posted 7/9/2013 06:53 AM

(((((((((((((sunshine226))))))))))))))

You chose YOURSELF. That's wonderful!

newnormal posted 7/9/2013 06:55 AM

(((((Sunshine)))))

callmecrazy posted 7/9/2013 07:10 AM

You can hold your head up and honestly say you did all that you could have and this sets firmly on his shoulders regardless of who has to make it official.

Best wishes on the next chapter of your life.

TrustGone posted 7/9/2013 07:46 AM

Good for you!!! You deserve better than what this POS has given you. I know it still hurts now, but it will get better once you finally let go. (((HUGS)))

tushnurse posted 7/9/2013 07:50 AM

Congrats!!! No spouse should ever be a second choice. Period.
Stay strong.

Jaded4life posted 7/9/2013 08:11 AM

((((((Sunshine)))))) good for you!! Time to take care and live for YOU!

nowiknow23 posted 7/9/2013 08:18 AM

(((((((sunshine))))))))

Ostrich80 posted 7/9/2013 08:25 AM

Gosh sunshine that's awesome!! Ahhh hope to be on the other side one day too...yay for you!!!!!

movingforward13 posted 7/9/2013 10:33 AM

I am happy for YOU. You made the choice and not waiting for him to do it. Stick to it, once he realizes you are serious he may try to come back. Don't let him.

simplydevastated posted 7/9/2013 11:15 AM

I wish I was as strong as you.

(((HUGS)))

sunshine226 posted 7/9/2013 13:04 PM

thank you everyone

Newlease posted 7/9/2013 13:34 PM

Good for you!

Trust me when I tell you that in a year or two you will look back and wonder why you were willing to wait around for someone who should have been putting you FIRST and working his ass off to win you back.

Sending strength and peace.

NL

ElectricBlue posted 7/9/2013 17:44 PM

I'm so proud of you! I love it when I see someone here who is able to take that step! I can't yet for myself but I'm very happy for you!

PinkJeepLady posted 7/9/2013 18:16 PM

Thanks for sharing your strength! I am proud of you too, way to go girl!
I wanted to ask you if it is getting easier than it was when you decided enough was enough?
Take care,

stillhere09 posted 7/10/2013 06:51 AM

Good for you! Once the mind is made up to the point of no going back, it brings a peace that you haven't felt in a long time.

After that, you begin to realize that you can do anything you want to with your life. Old interests, old hobbies, etc. Life becomes fun - instead of tense days wondering where he is and who he is with.

The next phase you go through after that is discovering that you are getting yourself back, the self that existed years ago before you met him.

Happiness will reign again, trust me. I've been in NC with my WH for about 2 years, and I love life now. You have much to look forward to.