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Newest Member: Alone73 (46062)

User Topic: Making a tough choice
BaxtersBFF
♂ 26859
Member # 26859
Default  Posted: 8:41 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi everyone,

I can't remember if I've ever started a thread in General, but this seems like the best place to post this. I'm giving up my role as a Guide here on SI.

Everything is fine, there are no big issues or changes that me and gerrygirl are dealing with. We could say that we are reconciled, but i think we see it as something that needs to be maintained rather than a destination.. It's just time to make a change.

I am forever grateful for the confidence that Deeply Scared and Mangled Heart put in me in asking me to be a Guide. I felt very honored and humbled to have been given the opportunity to give back to SI after receiving so much help from everyone on the site.

I can't express how much fun it has been getting to know and work with meta, AN, jo2love, wifehad5, razzie, moo and NIK. They are an incredible group and give a lot of their own time in support of the site. Have to tip my hat to the other staff who've served during my time here (thinking of Fallen and UR)...which I think is three and a half years now...and I have to thank gerrygirl most of all for her patience in waiting for me while I finished up that one last post to a newbie WS...

But the site wouldn't be what it is if it weren't for each and every member here from the newbies to the veterans to the infrequent posters...it is a culmination of so many varied experiences that make SI such a wonderful experience.

So, that being said, I feel like I'm in a place where I need to let go a bit. Doesn't mean I'm leaving...just can't see that happening yet...but letting go to focus more on other things in my personal life.

I am tempted to reminisce about things or try to come up with some parting wisdom. I think though that plain heartfelt gratitude would be best to express to all of you. Thank you all for being there for me and for gerrygirl too. We both feel very lucky to have found SI.


WH - 44
BW - gerrygirl

Posts: 6103 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Boise
simplydevastated
♀ 25001
Member # 25001
Default  Posted: 8:45 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you for everything you've done here. The guidance and support are appreciated by many


Me - BS, 39 (I'm not old...I'm vintage)
Two Wonderful children - DS10, DD7
Married, for now... (4+ D-Day - listed in profile.)

Posts: 5854 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: In the darkest depths of hell!
lieshurt
♀ 14003
Member # 14003
Default  Posted: 8:45 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Baxter, I know your wisdom has helped many on this site. I've always enjoyed reading your posts. I'm glad you aren't leaving because you would surely be missed.

Wishing you and Gerrygirl the best always.


A relationship without trust is like a car without gas. You can stay in it all you want, but it won't go anywhere.

Posts: 13881 | Registered: Mar 2007 | From: Houston
authenticnow
♀ 16024
Member # 16024
Default  Posted: 8:52 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Making me cry, dammit!

You know what's amazing about this place? I'm thinking of sitting in DS and MH's living room at the g2g, talking to you and thinking how different we all are in so many ways. Yet, so connected in our need to get support and give support here, and the strong connection we all share.

We all shared some stories that weekend, and we laughed a lot.

Cheers!

And thanks again for helping me and LD in our journey, and for being such a great Guide.


Take up your space (and do it well).

"That's the thing about pain, it demands to be felt."


Posts: 39005 | Registered: Sep 2007
heartbroken0903
♀ 27879
Member # 27879
Default  Posted: 8:55 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You've been a big help to me during my time here. Thanks for everything.


Me: XWS, 30s, 5-month EA/PA in '09-'10
Husband: XBS, 40s
No kids

Married 2.5 years
D-day 3/6/10
Divorced 5/14/10

We remarried in 2014.


Posts: 2374 | Registered: Mar 2010 | From: the cat's meow
stillhere09
♀ 24924
Member # 24924
Default  Posted: 9:02 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Thank you for all you've done, Baxter. You've been a great asset to SI. And I'm glad you'll still be here.


Me-50 BW
Him-55,STBXWH

Walk a Mile In My Shoes
Married 14 yrs. Now Separated & in NC
2 grown DD's - his from previous M
4 grown kids (2DS, 2DD) mine from previous M


Posts: 3035 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: Ohio
Mrs Panda
♀ 27303
Member # 27303
Default  Posted: 9:02 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Crap. Who's going to be kind to the newbies now? Cuz you know that's not my style.
Great job on everything you have done here. I would call you one of the Great Waywards but we're supposed to be into humility and all that.
Peace.


Me-41 FWW Him-45BH
M 13years. Reconciled.
DDay#1 Nov 2008 (OM2)
DDay#2 Aug 2009 (Confessed to OM 2001)
"Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand." -Kurt Vonnegut

Posts: 2008 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: The SouthEast
misskirby
♀ 34594
Member # 34594
Default  Posted: 9:06 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You have truly made reading in the Wayward Forum much easier for me, and helped so many people, both WS and BS, understand each other a little better, I think. You have a real affinity for making people feel comfortable posting, and doing it while still challenging them. I think you are also quite a great contributor to the BS questions for WS thread, and for that I send you many thanks. You have been a great guide. Thanks for all the time you've put into SI!


Me-BS, Late 20's
Him-WH, Late 20's
M 9 years, together 14
DS and DD
D-Day 1/16/12

"Long is the way And hard, that out of Hell leads up to Light" -John Milton, Paradise Lost


Posts: 218 | Registered: Jan 2012
BaxtersBFF
♂ 26859
Member # 26859
Default  Posted: 9:07 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have no idea what you're talking about Mrs. Panda...


WH - 44
BW - gerrygirl

Posts: 6103 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Boise
isadora
♀ 29130
Member # 29130
Default  Posted: 9:13 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have always learned a great deal reading your posts. Thanks for all you do on SI.


Me: BW Him: WH
Married: 12 yrs
2 DDs and DSs all under 10
2 Affairs - 2010 year long PA/EA, 2008 2 month online EA
Multiple D-Days

I can only control myself, no one else. I do not have that kind of power.


Posts: 4521 | Registered: Jul 2010 | From: Back home again in Indiana
nowiknow23
♀ 33226
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 10:34 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It truly will not be the same in the Guide ditch without you, but I'm relieved that it's not a real good-bye. See you round the boards, BBFF.


You can call me NIK

"Keep your face always toward the sunshine - and shadows will fall behind you."
-Walt Whitman


Posts: 26548 | Registered: Aug 2011
metamorphisis
♀ 12041
Member # 12041
Default  Posted: 10:38 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You will be so very missed in the dungeons
THANK YOU. Seriously. You've been wonderful for all of our members, and the staff and the website overall. It's easier to say good-bye knowing you will still be around to post. Don't go too far!



“We don't see things as they are; we see them as we are.”... Anais Nin

Posts: 45432 | Registered: Sep 2006
Jrazz
♀ 31349
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 10:52 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I know change is good, this still sucks. It's like my big brother is going off to college or something. I know it's not good-bye good-bye, but the Ditch is not ever going to look or feel the same.

Thank you for being my friend. Thank you for being completely different than me and both respecting my viewpoint and teaching me new ones.

Thank you for all you did/do for the Waywards that come here looking for hope and guidance. Please please please don't be a stranger - there's nobody who can fill your shoes.

Now I'm crying. Mergh. (Sits in corner with AN, waiting for waaaahmbulance.)

I am going to be in full overbearingly pushy mode to get you and gerrygirl out to CA sometime. Mini Me's welcome. This is the tradeoff. Ok?


"Welcome the rawness of vulnerability as an opportunity to open." - Pema Chodron

Me: BW 35
Crazz: WH 33
Daughter: 4.5 Going on 16


Posts: 18703 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
jo2love
♀ 31528
Member # 31528
Default  Posted: 10:56 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You have been an amazing Guide and friend. Thank you for all you have done. I'm glad you will still be posting here on SI.

I need a chocolate lava cake.


Posts: 36832 | Registered: Mar 2011
stilllovingher
♂ 29959
Member # 29959
Default  Posted: 11:03 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

this is a good thing, congratulations

(awesome quote about life moving forward goes here)


The only difference between a butt kisser and a brown noser is depth perception.
I'm sure WAL would agree.

Posts: 2411 | Registered: Oct 2010 | From: still BFE, but now BFE, CA
Mama_of_3_Kids
♀ 26651
Member # 26651
Default  Posted: 11:24 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Change is never easy, but sometimes it's necessary. Thank you for taking the role of a guide...I'm sure there are times you felt like your head was going to explode, but you're very appreciated


Me: FBW/30 Him: FWH/34 The kidlets: DS14, DS10, and DD8 The hounds: Four Shih Tzu's
Finally, completely R'd
Clothed in strength and dignity, with nothing to fear, she smiles when she thinks about the future.~Proverbs 31:25

Posts: 11596 | Registered: Dec 2009
Unagie
♀ 37091
Member # 37091
Default  Posted: 11:30 PM, July 9th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You have given me some great advice so I'm happy it's not a forever goodbye. You're doing what you need to do.


Heartbroken madhatter trying to rebuild

No longer together

"There are times when our reality is nothing but pain, and to escape that pain the mind must leave reality behind." Patrick Rothfuss


Posts: 2813 | Registered: Oct 2012
Sad in AZ
♀ 24239
Member # 24239
Default  Posted: 5:08 AM, July 10th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Awwww...Your calm demeanor and sensible attitude are such a comfort; I'm glad you're not leaving permanently. Enjoy the peace and stability that you and gerrygirl have created and keep finding new beaches to explore


Hallelujah! Holy shit! Where's the tylenol?

Posts: 20569 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Upstate NY
wifehad5
♂ 15162
Member # 15162
Default  Posted: 6:09 AM, July 10th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Your wisdom and guidance will be sorely missed. Thanks for being there for all of us


FBH - 42
FWW - 43 (BrokenRoad)
2 kids 7&12

The people you do your life with shape the life you live


Posts: 37905 | Registered: Jun 2007 | From: Michigan
Tred
♂ 34086
Member # 34086
Default  Posted: 7:23 AM, July 10th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks for all you've done Baxter. People like you make SI such a wonderful place. Best of luck to you, Gerrygirl, and your namesake.


Married: 17 years (14 @JFO)
D-Day: 11/09/11
"Ohhhhh...shut up Tred!" - NOT the official SI motto (DS)

Posts: 4138 | Registered: Dec 2011
Topic Posts: 43
Pages: 1 · 2 · 3

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