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Eldest DD update

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 MovingUpward (original poster member #14866) posted at 2:54 AM on Thursday, July 11th, 2013

I posted a few weeks ago about my dd and her financial aid fiasco. Well she reapply and was only able to get loans. We met again tonight along with the XW. After understanding the situation, XW wanted to talk with me alone about seeing if we could cover the small amount that DD was wanting to take an unsubsidized loan for. While XW was trying to explain to DD that she wanted to talk with me before she accepts her loans because tuition for the Fall is due this Friday. In the course of conveying that to DD everything went downhill between XW and DD.

So on the bright side DD got some loans so I am not faced with dealing with her crisis and possible manipulation. On the down side it sucked see XW and DD both being bull headed and neither was listening to the other. And DD's sense of entitlement is still running high.

Thanks to all for your support.

posts: 54450   ·   registered: Jun. 4th, 2007
id 6404107
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nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 3:01 AM on Thursday, July 11th, 2013

I'm so glad the loans came through for DD, Moo.

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6404112
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sad12008 ( member #18179) posted at 3:33 AM on Thursday, July 11th, 2013

All's well that ends well! Glad the immediate crisis passed, Moo ~

You can't fill a cup with no bottom.

posts: 4280   ·   registered: Feb. 13th, 2008   ·   location: a new start together
id 6404134
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jo2love ( member #31528) posted at 4:07 AM on Thursday, July 11th, 2013

I'm glad she was able to get the loans.

posts: 51035   ·   registered: Mar. 16th, 2011
id 6404167
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TattoodChinaDoll ( member #34602) posted at 6:46 AM on Thursday, July 11th, 2013

One step at a time. Glad to hear you got some good news.

Me: 35
WH: 37 TimeToManUp
Married: 14 years, together 19 years
3 daughters: 12, 8, 6, and 2 angel babies (2013 and 2014)

D-Day: 12/21/2011
Confronted him: 12/22/2011

This is the most difficult thing I've ever done.

posts: 1841   ·   registered: Jan. 20th, 2012   ·   location: New Jersey
id 6404275
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Jrazz ( member #31349) posted at 6:54 AM on Thursday, July 11th, 2013

Big relief for the most part.

I'm sorry that you still have to get tangled the frustrating/emotional side of this. You're a GREAT dad and just doing what you can.

(((Moo)))

"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." - Deeply Scared's mom

posts: 29076   ·   registered: Feb. 28th, 2011   ·   location: California
id 6404278
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authenticnow ( member #16024) posted at 11:37 AM on Thursday, July 11th, 2013

I'm glad she got the loans, Moo.

Not sure when that sense of entitlement ends. I'm sorry there was friction, but it sounds like for now things are moving forward for DD and that's good!

DS, you are forever in my heart. Thank you for sharing your beautiful spirit with me. I will always try to live by the example you have set. I love you and miss you every day and am sorry you had to go so soon, it just doesn't seem fair.

posts: 55165   ·   registered: Sep. 2nd, 2007
id 6404331
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lynnm1947 ( member #15300) posted at 3:13 PM on Thursday, July 11th, 2013

I'm happy for your (sort of) positive outcome, MOO. One less rock on your back.

Age: 64..ummmmmmm, no...............65....no...oh, hell born in 1947. You figure it out!

"I could have missed the pain, but I would have had to miss the dance." Garth Brooks

posts: 8765   ·   registered: Jul. 11th, 2007   ·   location: Toronto, Canada
id 6404465
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tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 5:17 PM on Thursday, July 11th, 2013

Ahhh it's a nice feeling when things work out.

Good for you.

Me: FBSHim: FWSKids: 23 & 27 Married for 32 years now, was 16 at the time.D-Day Sept 26 2008R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.

posts: 20379   ·   registered: Oct. 1st, 2008   ·   location: St. Louis
id 6404591
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thebighurt ( member #34722) posted at 7:26 PM on Thursday, July 11th, 2013

I'm glad you have a solution for the current semester. Hopefully she won't get in too deep with loans. I hope you can talk with her about that.

All my kids went cheap enough that there were no loans, but DGD finished a few years ago, now has the equivalent of two house payments and is very sorry she went that route.

You're doing a great job, but hope DD and XW can learn to talk with each other.

Finding what life could have been....... Why didn't I see it?

posts: 5033   ·   registered: Feb. 3rd, 2012   ·   location: the Other Side
id 6404767
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Kajem ( member #36134) posted at 8:04 PM on Thursday, July 11th, 2013

I am glad DD is continuing her education. I think college, graduation, and looking for job will temper her sense of entitlement.

Hugs,

K

I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - UnknownRelationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

posts: 6708   ·   registered: Jul. 15th, 2012   ·   location: Florida
id 6404821
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persevere ( member #31468) posted at 3:03 AM on Saturday, July 13th, 2013

I'm glad the fall is worked out. That sense of entitlement seems to ebb and flow around here.... Real life seems to help at times.

DDay:2011
Status: D 2011
Remarried to a kind and wonderful man - 2017

Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K.

posts: 5329   ·   registered: Mar. 9th, 2011
id 6406526
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chopper ( member #5772) posted at 1:22 PM on Monday, July 15th, 2013

I'm glad Moo! Sorry haven't been up to date. Big hugs!

Me BS(52) (39 at DD)
WH passed away on 3/21/2013(52) (44 at DD)
2 Kids S(27) D(24) (14 and 11 at DD)
"To be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved."–George MacDonald
"Not being able to govern events, I govern myself." –

posts: 17829   ·   registered: Nov. 8th, 2004   ·   location: Guatemala
id 6408257
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wildbananas ( member #10552) posted at 2:46 PM on Monday, July 15th, 2013

Sorry for the friction between XW and DD but good news on the loans! One less thing to worry about.

Travel light, live light, spread the light, be the light. ~ Yogi Bhajan

posts: 16592   ·   registered: May. 1st, 2006   ·   location: Somewhere
id 6408327
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