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Newest Member: Jsprime (48485)

User Topic: It Happened!!
♀ 37165
Member # 37165
Default  Posted: 7:34 PM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It happened....

I forgave him!!!

After his latest IC session he told me about the hypothetical situation dr presented (what if OW showed up after all this time at our door and said A started again 3 months ago). He asked what my reaction would be, worried that just her showing up may be the final straw. I realized with my answer (call police and not even acknowledge since we know now that she is a sociopath and I know she would be lying. We both have find friends on our phones so I know where he has been) where I was on my path.

I had reached a new level. No triggers, no anger. I trust him...99%....won't ever be 100 again. It was then I realized, at some point I have already forgiven him. I looked at my own actions and discovered it. I look at his actions and they match his words.

So I told him last night. He hugged me and began crying, and then I began to cry. He still said he will forever be making sure I don't regret giving us a chance, apologized for hurting me so badly, and swearing he would never ever cause me a reason to cry in pain like that ever again,

We are still working on us in MC to keep strengthening our M. But the focus there is on US. He is still going to IC to completely deal with his issues so he is never 'that man' again. Facing his demons head on.

Just in a really good place today

DDay 9/2011
4-6 months of TT'ing
11/2012- Thanks for the HPV!!!
Fully R'd
"Just as ripples spread out when a single pebble is dropped into water, the actions of individuals can have far-reaching effects"-Dalai Lama

Posts: 265 | Registered: Oct 2012
♀ 35862
Member # 35862
Default  Posted: 7:37 PM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

That is SO awesome! Those moments are great.

I'm so happy for you both. Hope all continues to go well.

Me: BS H: WS
4 kids
DD #1 7-11-08
DD#2 8-21-09 same OW, A never ended.
Started R in 12-09
"If what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, I should be able to bench press a Buick."

Posts: 786 | Registered: Jun 2012
♀ 36519
Member # 36519
Default  Posted: 7:39 PM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So, so happy for you.

BS (me): 50
WS: 50
Married: 26 yrs
Kids: 2
OW: Co-worker, 7 yr LTA
DD 8/1/2012, Working on R

Posts: 1061 | Registered: Aug 2012
♀ 36576
Member # 36576
Default  Posted: 9:17 PM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

That is fantastic! I'm so happy for you. That's got to be an amazing feeling.

wtf?? How insane does your life have to get that you want to polygraph your freaking HUSBAND. ~ OldCow18

It's hard to make a decision when you're too tired to hold on and too in love to let go. ~ unknown

Posts: 178 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: midwest
♀ 28889
Member # 28889
Default  Posted: 9:23 PM, July 11th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Ws 62
Bs me--59
Married 41 years
D Day 11/30/08
Just trying to feel normal.It is getting there, but very slow.

Posts: 181 | Registered: Jun 2010 | From: Tennessee
♀ 33956
Member # 33956
Default  Posted: 12:27 AM, July 12th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

i am so happy for you!!! your story gives us all hope. i hope to be you someday.

BS (41):(Former Doormat)
WS (39):(Busted Cheater)
Married: 10 years, 3 kids under 5
DD1: 10/11 PA/EA with pilates instructor/former stripper.
DD2: 10/12 False r, cheating with other women, online dating,Substance abuse issues.
R:Last chance

Posts: 1053 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: Alabama
♂ 15902
Member # 15902
Default  Posted: 2:16 AM, July 12th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Me: BH, Her: FWW - Long Term EA/PA
d-day: June 25, 2007
Married 30 years, Reconciled

Inner peace begins the moment you choose not to allow another person or event to control your emotions.

Posts: 5951 | Registered: Aug 2007
♀ 27090
Member # 27090
Default  Posted: 3:43 AM, July 12th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Wow! Thanks for sharing

FWW / BS (me)
FWH / BS (him)
In R ...

Posts: 85 | Registered: Jan 2010
Topic Posts: 8

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