BH is at work and obviously triggered by something there because I just receive the following text:
"I hate women they are all ------- they will screw anything"
I had a hard time figuring out how to respond. He has no one but me to talk to about triggers etc because he does not want to out the A to anyone. And he doesn't unload on me often at all. This sort of text is very rare.
It's a little scary for me because I can't be like a guy friend and say, "yep dude all women are ------'s". Can I? I was a (whatever) when I had the A, lied, gas lighted, blame shifted, etc. but I'm working very hard to be my best self. But I don't even think he was talking about me in his text. I think he's just upset and venting a little. He needs understanding.
I'm really not as accomplished as many of you on here in expressing myself. So I thought really hard and replied, "I'm sorry your day is sucking."
I think I could have done better. I hate texting stuff like that.
Please let's don't talk about this like it's abusive. You would not believe how well he treats me or how kindly he normally speaks to me.
It's a relief for me when he will share his pain even if it's hard to hear sometimes.
I'm looking for how could I have handled this better. Or how I can still handle it better...
PS---he's not going to be happy I shared this on SI but we are anonymous.....
[This message edited by knightsbff at 4:15 PM, July 15th (Monday)]
D-day August 27, 2012
3 kids and 2 dogs
I edit often because I make a lot of typos. ☺️