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Exclusive...now what??

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lostmommy posted 7/16/2013 09:23 AM

My man ("SO"?) and I have had the exclusive talk after one month of dating again (last time we were dating from October-January but I wasn't ready for him yet). My best friend tells me that this doesn't mean we're boyfriend/girlfriend as that is another "level".

If that's true, at what point do we "elevate" to the boyfriend/girlfriend/SO level, whatever the case may be?

Can someone please explain this to me? Talk to me like I'm five!

chikastuff posted 7/16/2013 09:40 AM

To me exclusive means bf/gf level commitment.

Amazonia posted 7/16/2013 09:42 AM

It's semantics. If you two are on the same page about boundaries, expectations, and communication, then the labels don't really matter.

forced2moveon posted 7/16/2013 09:43 AM

If both of you have had the "exclusive" talk together, your relationship is exclusive. I've never heard of this "different" stage because you've only been back together a month? My SO and I have been together over 9 years and we had the exclusive talk just one month into out dating and we have both been exclusive since.

lostmommy posted 7/16/2013 09:48 AM

That's what I thought! I was beginning to think I was crazy for thinking that way and making assumptions though. I'm glad that I'm not!

Amazonia posted 7/16/2013 09:52 AM

Another thing that doesn't matter: Your friend's opinion or perception of your relationship. As long as you and he are on the same page, you're good to go.

lostmommy posted 7/16/2013 10:01 AM

You're right, Ama!

hurtinky posted 7/16/2013 21:23 PM

Ask him if you are his girlfriend! My guess is that you are!

million pieces posted 7/17/2013 11:13 AM

Actually I get the difference. I've had several discussion w single friends who may be dating someone, don't see others but would not think of their partner as GF/BF.

lostmommy posted 7/17/2013 13:30 PM

I've had several discussion w single friends who may be dating someone, don't see others but would not think of their partner as GF/BF.

Why? What's the thought process behind that?

lieshurt posted 7/17/2013 13:42 PM

Why? What's the thought process behind that?

For many, it's about allowing time to get to know the other person and see if a true relationship develops without any interruptions from others.

soulsearcher4 posted 7/17/2013 15:56 PM

Why? What's the thought process behind that?

Exclusive = Not seeing anyone else, only this person.

BF/GF = Mixing/meeting friends/family.

At least, that's my just made up right now of the difference between the two. I can see how someone could see a difference between the two. However, me personally if I were exclusive I would be BF/GF, too.

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