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Newest Member: Newgem (61508)

User Topic: where there is 1 rat, there are 50
♀ 33956
Member # 33956
Default  Posted: 4:29 PM, July 16th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

i believe true in my case. i used to think that i could get through all of this if the cheating was a ONS...or a brief affair that only happend once...and "he didnt love her." i am even envious of some SI posters who look for support after learning their spouse cheated one time...or "it was just a kiss." but me? no way....he did it all. and when he minimized his cheating with the whore at the gym....i fell for it at first...thinking that was it. i have learned that infedelity is rotten...and full of lies...and that it is almost never that cut and dry...there is always more. if not with that one ap...with others. i just didnt want to see that in my case.

in my journey on the infedelity rollercoaster....what i have learned is that where you find one rat or roach...there is usually a bunch more where they came from. and you know what? it is true.

after learning about the girl at the gym....9 months later i learned i was in false r...with another woman (15 years older)....and then when i scoured the phone records and found secret email accounts....i hit the motherload....on-line dating, other women, dirty pictures, and emails that reveal the depth of the affairs.

no way to minimize any of it.

it is what it is.

i will no longer be a fool again...i feel like i have btdt, you know?

i know from my experience now..and wont ever forget...that if i find a roach, i can count on the fact that there are a thousand more where that came from.

[This message edited by sri624 at 4:32 PM, July 16th (Tuesday)]

BS (41):(Former Doormat)
WS (39):(Busted Cheater)
Married: 10 years, 3 kids under 5
DD1: 10/11 PA/EA with pilates instructor/former stripper.
DD2: 10/12 False r, cheating with other women, online dating,Substance abuse issues.
R:Last chance

Posts: 1065 | Registered: Nov 2011 | From: Alabama
♀ 33732
Member # 33732
Default  Posted: 4:46 PM, July 16th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

i am even envious of some SI posters who look for support after learning their spouse cheated one time

Oh please don't be envious since the ONS may have been, I know in my case, precipitated by EA. I know the way it started since I saw it coming like a freight train at noon.

ITA you only see the tip of the iceberg, most of it is submerged pretty damn well.

Him - FWSO
OW - DBC Xwife
DDAY 09/14/11 ONS w/DBCxWOW with 4 mos EA
Solidly in R

Posts: 1005 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: MA
♀ 37184
Member # 37184
Default  Posted: 1:25 PM, July 17th (Wednesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


This was my case as well.

Posts: 1023 | Registered: Oct 2012 | From: new york
Topic Posts: 3

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