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Ostrich80 (original poster member #34827) posted at 9:37 AM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
"If you say your in love with 2 people at the same time, pick the 2nd because if you loved the 1st, you wouldnt have fallen for the 2nd"
I don't know if I want to switch him from HOT to NOT, or thank him for clearing that up for me. : 
BS..me
WS..him
Been with him over half my life
4kid
DD1 10-01-09 DD2 02-12-12 discovered it never ended
OW..nothing special. Just your average skank
Status..#$%@????
frankiebaby ( new member #39602) posted at 10:44 AM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
I don't know. With my state of mind right now I'd be THRILLED if he woke up and said he was leaving me for OW-- then I know I wouldn't have to deal with him. I really, really would sing and dance because that means I'm FREE of this jackass that isn't what he pretended to be.
It's this two-timing and being nice to me at home and pretending he's an all-around good and faithful husband that's making me sick to my stomach.
If someone doesn't want me and only me, I'd rather not be involved with them at all. I'd never make a man choose. The fact that he cheated to me is a choice in itself. None of them are worth it imo.
nomistakeaboutit ( member #36857) posted at 10:50 AM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
What do you see wrong about what he said?
(Edit: Please see my second post, below.)
[This message edited by nomistakeaboutit at 6:59 AM, July 17th (Wednesday)]
Me: BH 65.........Her: WW 55
DD: 15.......DS: 12. (5 and 2 on DDay)
Married for six years.
DDay: 12-25-11 Divorced: 7-15-12
...................................
Loyalty2Liberty ( member #36714) posted at 10:59 AM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
I think he's kinda on to something in his reasoning, but not thinking it through enough.
If claiming to love the second person means not loving the first enough to be faithful, then the same applies to the second too. Why feel the need to cling to the first if the second is that great, kwim?
In short, you love neither.
In my observation this also means your motives for being involved with each/both are deffinately impure. It also means most likely your feelings/motivations in general are not remotely close to what you delude yourself into thinking they are. Scary stuff. Might want to take a good hard look at that.
confused615 ( member #30826) posted at 11:25 AM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
Considering he is/was a wayward husband, this doesn't surprise me any.
I take it to mean..if you are in a relationship,and cheat with an OW/OM,and you are conflicted(fog) as to who you want to be with..choose the OM/OW...because if you really loved your BW/BH then you wouldn't have fallen in "love" with the OM/OW.
It reeks of justification.
BS(me)44
FWH 48
4 kids
M: June 2001
D-Day: 8/10/10
..that feeling you get in your stomach, when you heart's broken. It's like all the butterflies just died.
sunshine226 ( member #38851) posted at 12:49 PM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
I've seen that quote and I HATE it, JMO
Me-BS (44)
Him-WS (47)
DDay 1/1/2012, common law for 22 1/2 years when he began A in September 2011
Status: moving on without him
nomistakeaboutit ( member #36857) posted at 12:58 PM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
Ohhhhhhhhh! My bad. Sorry. I misread the quote. I thought he was saying to pick the first.
OK. New opinion. He's a great actor who would be a horrible husband. His comment is shallow thinking at its worst.
Me: BH 65.........Her: WW 55
DD: 15.......DS: 12. (5 and 2 on DDay)
Married for six years.
DDay: 12-25-11 Divorced: 7-15-12
...................................
naivewife ( member #38375) posted at 1:08 PM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
Aubrie84 wrote a wonderful response to this quote in the Wayward forum. I wish I could find it. Don't even remember the title. Anyone else know how to track it down?
I had no idea this was from Johnny Depp. What an arse.
D-day #1 - 1/23/13
false R, then...
D-day #2 - 3/26/13
I will come for the benefit of the sick, remaining free of all intentional injustice, of all mischief and in particular of sexual relations with both female and male persons. - Hippocratic Oath
wert ( member #34478) posted at 1:11 PM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
Johnny Depp - great actor. As with most celebrities they should really stick to what they are good at.
From time to time I see popular or celebrity items posted here on SI and to this day I still don't understand why people pay attention. We should not look to others for inspiration, we should look to ourselves.
take care...
wanttogoforward ( member #29912) posted at 1:12 PM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
I saw that quote before.... and I think he is more saying that if you go that far to fall in love with another person then have the respect to just get out to of the first relationship... actually something that should have been done in the first place BEFORE you went for anther person....
In a way this makes sense, and in a way it doesn't .... depends on how you look at it.... maybe he could make his statement a bit more clear!
ButterflyGirl ( member #38377) posted at 3:16 PM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
If claiming to love the second person means not loving the first enough to be faithful, then the same applies to the second too. Why feel the need to cling to the first if the second is that great, kwim?
In short, you love neither.
Exactly..
MOW likes to act all high and mighty, like she must be so fabulous that he left me for her. But then why did he keep her a dirty little secret for over a year and a half?? Why not leave me right away?? The stupid b*tch needs to realize that she's not all that special. HE LOVES ONLY HIMSELF.
ETA: Oh, and I left him, so they can lie to each other all they want. He didn't even "choose" her, he took what was leftover since I was gone..
[This message edited by ButterflyGirl at 9:18 AM, July 17th (Wednesday)]
OldCow18 ( member #39670) posted at 3:20 PM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
In an effort to still like JD, is it at all possible he is saying this because SHE cheated on him and he's telling her to go scratch? I don't know the history...
Me, BW forty something, DD & DS,
Married to WH (49) 11 years, together 16
D-Day 6.8.13
Skye ( member #325) posted at 3:22 PM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
I agree with him. My husband didn't love me if he chose to cheat. He should have left and tried to live his life with his girlfriend. ROFLMAO He was selfish to cheat and selfish to stay. My eyes are wide open to him.
eta: Of course most cheaters will tell their first loves they never loved the OW. Okay1
[This message edited by Skye at 9:24 AM, July 17th (Wednesday)]
Aubrie ( member #33886) posted at 3:22 PM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
Sigh. I thought this was one of the dumbest quotes evah.
For you naivewife:
http://www.survivinginfidelity.com/forums.asp?tid=450823
"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne
DragnHeart ( member #32122) posted at 8:10 PM on Thursday, July 18th, 2013
I just saw that quote the other day. I didn't know exactly how to take that...
Does the person really know what love is in the first place? I would think not...makes me wonder then if my wh felt he "loved" ow2 did/does he really love me? Ugh!
I read the post by Aubrie84 and she totally hit the nail on the head.
Me: BS 46 WH: 37 (BrokenHeart911)Four little dragons. Met 2006. Married 2008. Dday of LTPA with co worker October 19th 2010. Knew about EA with ow1 before that. Now up to PA #5. Serial fucking Cheater.
selkiescot ( member #23777) posted at 9:26 PM on Thursday, July 18th, 2013
Johnny Depp according to some very long on looks. But a bit short in the brains department.
The truth shall set you free or reveal the name of the OW!
ME 57
WH 64
DDAYs TOO MANY
daughter 27
You give me gifts! I don't want your gifts I want the truth. That's the greatest gift.
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