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My H and I have been married 10 years. We have two boys...8 and 6. Long story short 6 years ago I had an EA with a man online. H stayed and we tried to work on our marriage. Two years ago 4/27/11 I found out he was having a PA with a co-worker. He left me for her, lived with her for two years and on 5/11/13 decided he wanted to work on our marriage and came home.

It's been hard to say the least on both of us. I just hope there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Maybe we are in R or maybe not I don't know, so confused.

Welcome to SI. I am sorry you are here. But you have found the best place that you never wanted to be.

There is a tremendous amount of support and information here.

If you haven't already check out the healing library. The link is in the upper left yellow box. It is a great place to start.

Read and post here. Whatever direction you decide you can find the hope that you will be OK

[This message edited by Chicho at 11:00 AM, July 17th (Wednesday)]

Thank you for the welcome! I have so many questions and thoughts I could go on for days. But lol one post at a time!

There is a madhatter thread in the I Can relate forum. Madhatter is a term we call members who wear both the BS and the WS hat.

Are the two of you in MC? IC? Are you both NC with the AP's?

Have you both been tested for STD's?

Are you both transparent? Each of you has the others passwords to all online accounts and cell phones?

Are you talking about it? Do you each answer the other's questions without blame or defensiveness?

Welcome to SI. You will find a lot of support here.

We are not in any counseling at this time. As far as I know we are both NC, I have not talked to mine in a year and he says he hasn't in a month.

Yes both been tested. Transparent yes although I find that I'm afraid to look so I don't. We do talk about it a lot.

Thank you! Support is what I need right now.

I'm so sorry to hear. I admire your courage. You're in the right place.