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Jannarae (original poster new member #39849) posted at 4:22 PM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
My H and I have been married 10 years. We have two boys...8 and 6. Long story short 6 years ago I had an EA with a man online. H stayed and we tried to work on our marriage. Two years ago 4/27/11 I found out he was having a PA with a co-worker. He left me for her, lived with her for two years and on 5/11/13 decided he wanted to work on our marriage and came home.
It's been hard to say the least on both of us. I just hope there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Maybe we are in R or maybe not I don't know, so confused.
AFrayedKnot ( member #36622) posted at 4:59 PM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
Welcome to SI. I am sorry you are here. But you have found the best place that you never wanted to be.
There is a tremendous amount of support and information here.
If you haven't already check out the healing library. The link is in the upper left yellow box. It is a great place to start.
Read and post here. Whatever direction you decide you can find the hope that you will be OK
[This message edited by Chicho at 11:00 AM, July 17th (Wednesday)]
BS 48fWS 44 (SurprisinglyOkay)DsD DSA whole bunch of shit that got a lot worse before it got better."Knowing is half the battle"
Jannarae (original poster new member #39849) posted at 6:01 PM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
Thank you for the welcome! I have so many questions and thoughts I could go on for days. But lol one post at a time!
confused615 ( member #30826) posted at 6:06 PM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
There is a madhatter thread in the I Can relate forum. Madhatter is a term we call members who wear both the BS and the WS hat.
Are the two of you in MC? IC? Are you both NC with the AP's?
Have you both been tested for STD's?
Are you both transparent? Each of you has the others passwords to all online accounts and cell phones?
Are you talking about it? Do you each answer the other's questions without blame or defensiveness?
Welcome to SI. You will find a lot of support here. 
BS(me)44
FWH 48
4 kids
M: June 2001
D-Day: 8/10/10
..that feeling you get in your stomach, when you heart's broken. It's like all the butterflies just died.
Jannarae (original poster new member #39849) posted at 7:11 PM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
We are not in any counseling at this time. As far as I know we are both NC, I have not talked to mine in a year and he says he hasn't in a month.
Yes both been tested. Transparent yes although I find that I'm afraid to look so I don't. We do talk about it a lot.
Thank you! Support is what I need right now.
2married2quit ( member #36555) posted at 7:16 PM on Wednesday, July 17th, 2013
I'm so sorry to hear. I admire your courage. You're in the right place.
BS - Me 47 WS - Her 45 ( she's a childhood sexual abuse survivor)
DDAY -#1- June 2012/ #2 -June 2015 / #3-August 2015
Married 25yrs. 2kids
She had 2 affairs with two different men.
Status: divorced.
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