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Trickle Trickle Trickle

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AceKnight posted 7/18/2013 22:46 PM

I need help with trickling the truth. My BS and I can be having a good time and I'm really enjoying her and the moment we are in and then a question comes that will be a mood killer.

I always trickle because of the moment and don't want to lose it but end up making it worse because I am trickling! It's like all the guilt, shame, and embarrassment come to the surface and I fight telling the truth! Please let me know how any of you have handle these moments.

20WrongsVs1 posted 7/18/2013 23:23 PM

We've all TT'd. That's why there's an abbreviation for it.

Are you saying when the question comes in, you lie because you don't want to kill the mood? Just trying to get clarification.

Someone here said recently, I think, they have sort of a three-second rule for telling the whole truth. Take a breath and say, "Sorry, that's not totally true. I didn't want to hurt you, so I instinctively fell back on my old ways of fudging the truth to protect you. I'm sorry. The hard truth is..."

AceKnight posted 7/18/2013 23:28 PM

Thanks! I don't like my BS suffering anymore than she already is dealing with this mess that I put us in.

Card posted 7/20/2013 11:08 AM

When we decided to reconcile -My wife and I immediately went out of state for the first week. We spent hours locked inside our hotel suite. she would ask every question she wanted to know and I would answer them radically honest. It was several hours in the AM and several hours in the PM. We would find a place and agree to stop, go eat, go shop, go walk about, and not discuss any A related stuff until we got back to the room. This went on for six days. We had no where to go and could not run even when it was rough. We cried a lot, she screamed at me more than once, we found time to laugh, hold each other and even made love. It was amazing to clean it all out... and she really had so few new questions when we returned home.

I know this is not an option for everyone, but I sure would recommend it to everyone.

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