but I am finally letting go of the sarcasm & little digs.
I think this is very important. If you have a spouse doing the real work it is unproductive to occasionally hit them over the head with a frying pan....so for the good of R it's necessary to take those first steps at moving away from the A.
Our reactions and how we say thing, IMO, matter. How we treat our spouse during R, matters.
I don't mean initially, we are so shocked and traumatized I give BS's a pass on what we say and do when we JFO
Year 3 will be ok, it gets calmer, less questions running through your brain. You'll have times where the A isn't even in your thoughts...it's a much slower ride than the first 2 years.
Important healing happens and a bond can really be re-formed going forward.
It's also important to remember you are walking a new path. Don't get complacent and slide into poor coping skills...be aware of your words/actions and feelings as you also continue to watch his.
I hope for your birthday you take time to celebrate you this year.You deserve it.