Cookies are required for login or registration. Please read and agree to our cookie policy to continue.

Newest Member: Anderson78

Divorce/Separation :
Wow, not even a head's up???

This Topic is Archived
default

 Mommato4 (original poster member #15906) posted at 12:31 AM on Tuesday, July 23rd, 2013

This is the text I got today from my XH.

He received paperwork today from my lawyer regarding the termination of alimony(I mentioned it to him when he asked me weeks ago to kick him back some CS for food because he has the kids for 6 weeks this summer) and for possible modification of CS. His income has gone up and he no longer has his previous CS obligation for his now 21 yr old son from his 1st marriage.

It's been 5 years since the D. The alimony is to end this 25th which is stated in our agreement. It has to be court ordered or else it continues (I won't let that happen due to the fact that it's not rightfully mine to take any longer).

My lawyer said well we can look at it all at once. That should save me money by bundling it together.

Wonder if he'll retain one and fight me on CS. He didn't in the D.

Should I have warned him?

[This message edited by Mommato4 at 7:27 PM, July 22nd (Monday)]

BS-me 34
XH-doesn't matter
4 kids
Divorced-7/25/2008

posts: 1414   ·   registered: Aug. 23rd, 2007   ·   location: PNW country
id 6416878
default

peridot ( member #18334) posted at 1:47 AM on Tuesday, July 23rd, 2013

No, you shouldn't have warned him and I would ignore that text.

I think...therefore, I'm single.

It is what it is.

posts: 4941   ·   registered: Feb. 23rd, 2008
id 6416930
default

devistatedmom ( member #24961) posted at 1:52 AM on Tuesday, July 23rd, 2013

You did him a favor, because as you said, he never would have filed, and the alimony wouldn't have stopped. Yes, his CS is going to go up...but do you think your CS is going to go up as much as the alimony was? I mean, this is going to save him cash, I would think. He shouldn't be upset, he should be thanking you!

Ok, maybe you could have/should have told him you were doing it...but in actual fact, you could have just filed for the raise in CS, and not said anything about the alimony.

BS(me) 46, Two wonderful teens.
He is no longer my best friend. Repeat until it sticks.

WH says marriage is over: May 15, 2009.
EA#2 July 20, 2009. Legally sep: Aug 16, 2009. DIVORCED!!!! Signed Nov 23, final Dec 24, 2010, adultery listed.

posts: 5921   ·   registered: Jul. 27th, 2009   ·   location: Canada
id 6416937
default

Snapdragon ( member #4286) posted at 1:53 AM on Tuesday, July 23rd, 2013

Two thing: No, you did not need to warn him. You talked about it a couple weeks ago. He is being released from alimony. You'd think that would be good news.

CS should be reviewed every few years. So, this should not be a surprise.

Kicking him back some CS money because he has the kids for 6 weeks doesn't make any sense. CS is set based on the amount of time each parent has with the children and the incomes of both parents. It should be considered a yearly amount of $ transfer that is divided into equal monthly increments. Each parents' monthly expenditures will vary. If you have an EOW arrangement, do you kick him back $ on months with 5 weekends? I'll bet not. So don't continue to practice.

Divorced - recovered and hoping to help.

"We're not broken, just bent, and we can learn to love again" ~Pink

posts: 4089   ·   registered: May. 4th, 2004   ·   location: Midwest
id 6416939
This Topic is Archived
Cookies on SurvivingInfidelity.com®

SurvivingInfidelity.com® uses cookies to enhance your visit to our website. This is a requirement for participants to login, post and use other features. Visitors may opt out, but the website will be less functional for you.

v.1.001.20250404a 2002-2025 SurvivingInfidelity.com® All Rights Reserved. • Privacy Policy