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Newest Member: Else (61873)

User Topic: Dday <4 wks ago & headed for divorce
♀ 39728
Member # 39728
Default  Posted: 9:17 PM, July 22nd (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

He didn't even fight for me or the marriage or the family. We've been together for 16 yrs and married for 11yrs. I don't even want him back but, my god, he didn't even fight for us!!! That almost hurts worse than the A. He won't end up with the OW because she lives in Asia and she's married and she won't leave her family. She's just an ego boost for him. Wo knows. I mean, I realize our marriage was not the best but now I feel worse than I did before. I had hope (before the A) that we could work on our issues. He does drink too much and I'm not into drinking at all. That was a big problem.
That's my latest. Headed for divorce.

Me: BS 44yo
Him: WS 42yo
Married 11yrs; together 16yr
Kids: 8yo and 3yo
Dday: June 26, 2013
Dday #2: July 22, 2013 - found out same woman and been going on since Dec 2012.
Starting the divorce process. Listing our home. Scared but hopeful.

Posts: 40 | Registered: Jul 2013
♂ 36857
Member # 36857
Default  Posted: 11:15 PM, July 22nd (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Hi Tennis Pro,

Sorry for your pain. I can relate. The A is one thing, but a lack of remorse and an easy willingness (or even a thinly veiled eagerness) to end the's just soul crushing.

I have tried hard to understand it. The closest I have come, so far, is to accept that my xWW was not the person I thought she was, and she didn't love me in the same way I loved her.

Strength to you.

Me: BH 58.........Her: WW 45
DD: 8..........DS: 6 (5 and 2 on DDay)
Married for six years.
DDay: 12-25-11 Divorced: 7-15-12

Posts: 1288 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: U.S.A.
♀ 31349
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 1:23 AM, July 23rd (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm so sorry, tennispro.

His lack of fighting isn't a reflection on you, it's all on him.


"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." - Deeply Scared's mom

Posts: 29076 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
Topic Posts: 3

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