Call her on it.
She is projecting. She is blameshifting and hoping to get a response out of you.
Say fine, if that is what you feel let's save the time and effort of MC and just file.
I am only interested in MC if we are both truly vested in wanting the marriage to be better in the end.
So if you aren't there. Please have an ounce of integrity and be honest for once in your life and just say so. I will be sad and disappointed but at least we will not continue to live in limbo.
Marriage is whatever two people make of it. When one person decides their needs are more important than the other's then you have conflict.
Not every woman is your wife. Just like every man is not like my FWH. Some are great and some are selfish broken people.
You deserve honesty and truth. Your wife is in denial and has not yet shown she is capable of taking responsibility for the aftermath of the affair.
Call her on it. 180 her NOW and put an x on the calendar as when you feel you can/will be ready to reevaluate the status of your marriage and any possible potential for reconciliation.
I am sorry you're here and I am so sorry you are hurting.
(((hugs and prayers)))