I'm so confused! So hard for me to decipher the two, or at least trust my judgment enough to figure out if I am overreacting. As in, am I jumping to conclusions based on a trigger that has nothing to do with current situation or person?
For example, if XWH cheated while saying he was participating in a sport, and now your SO wants to participate in the same sport, I'm sure your gut would tell you something. Like, "the last time this happened it didn't end good" but really isn't it an irrational fear, since people participating in a particular sport doesn't really have anything to do with cheating. BUT - then your gut is saying "Something is wrong here!"
(Just a example, has nothing to do with my situation.)