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Divorce/Separation :
Stuck between a rock and a hard spot

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 KAJENO2000 (original poster new member #38816) posted at 7:34 PM on Wednesday, July 24th, 2013

I am so thankful these forums are here. I read way more than I post but I feel right this minute that I am stuck between a rock and a hard spot.

It has been almost 9 months since this nightmare started and I am still stuck in the same house as asswipe and it is making the situation worse for me because I am not the one who asked for this, he did.

Anyways. We are still in the middle of bankruptcy and have a little less than 2 months to go until the bankruptcy is discharged pending no problems which there has not been until this point.

My problem is that my dad is going to have to co-sign with me on a lease and I am not sure if I should wait or if I can wait another two months or possibly longer to move out but I am very anal that something will happen with this bankruptcy to not make it dischargeable which again attorney doesn't think so.

I found this perfect little 3 bedroom 2 bath home a few blocks from where I live and in the same school district that will allow me to take our dog. My children have told me multiple times that they don't want to switch schools and why should they when asswipe is the one who did this.

It is very hard to find a home in the area that I am in and the house is still available but I am stuck because if my dad co-signs and something happenes with the bankruptcy then I am afraid he will be stuck because I can't afford it (which again attorney doesn't think so) but I don't think I can live in that house much longer with him. Each minute and each day that I am there I feel myself being pulled down because this is not what I want.

I just don't know if I should take the house and take the chance or be a big girl and wait it out until the bankruptcy is final.

Sorry to make this go on. I am just lost.

WH - 36
BS - 34 Me
DD - 11
DD - 6
DS - 6

posts: 14   ·   registered: Mar. 27th, 2013   ·   location: Maryland
id 6419224
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devistatedmom ( member #24961) posted at 8:23 PM on Wednesday, July 24th, 2013

Ask the bankruptcy lawyer if there would be any repercussions if you do get the apartment.

Can you afford to live there, while the two of you still have the house and haven't separated your finances yet? Although I totally get your father so-signing, I'd hate to see him get stuck if you move in then figure you can't keep up your payments.

BS(me) 46, Two wonderful teens.
He is no longer my best friend. Repeat until it sticks.

WH says marriage is over: May 15, 2009.
EA#2 July 20, 2009. Legally sep: Aug 16, 2009. DIVORCED!!!! Signed Nov 23, final Dec 24, 2010, adultery listed.

posts: 5921   ·   registered: Jul. 27th, 2009   ·   location: Canada
id 6419321
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 KAJENO2000 (original poster new member #38816) posted at 9:03 PM on Wednesday, July 24th, 2013

There would be no reprocussions if I do lease a place to live because we are surrendering our home because neither of us can afford separately.

We have separated our finances as of last week. The bills are split in half for now until I move out and then he would continue with whatever until they take the house.

I can afford the new place very much so with some money left over each month. I am not worried about that but its just my dad is cosigning and my bankruptcy is not final yet.

WH - 36
BS - 34 Me
DD - 11
DD - 6
DS - 6

posts: 14   ·   registered: Mar. 27th, 2013   ·   location: Maryland
id 6419391
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gypsybird87 ( member #39193) posted at 12:29 AM on Thursday, July 25th, 2013

If your dad is okay with taking the risk, then I think you should be too.

I'm currently trying to sort out housing options, and figure out what is possible for me... and believe me if the perfect thing came along, I would go for it.

Trust yourself.

Me: Enjoying life
Him: Someone else's problem

Follow your heart, but take your brain with you. ~ Alfred Adler
Letting go of the outcome is about the most empowering thing you can do for yourself. ~ LosferWords

posts: 1857   ·   registered: May. 7th, 2013   ·   location: Oregon
id 6419684
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