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Newest Member: Notnemore (60749)

User Topic: Looking raggedy
♀ 39169
Member # 39169
Default  Posted: 3:42 PM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This whole mess has taken a toll on my appearance. My face has aged dramatically in 3 months. Drawn, wrinkled, tired looking. Let me summarize my day at work:

"are you ok, triple?"

Um, no, but thanks for noticing I look like 9 miles of bad road.

Anyone else wearing this experience all over their face?

40 somethings - me BW after 20 years
D Day April 2013
Divorced November 2013
Time is a great healer but a terrible beautician.

Posts: 984 | Registered: May 2013
♀ 29912
Member # 29912
Default  Posted: 3:53 PM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I did... in the beginning... they all knew something terrible was wrong but since I wasn't talking they mostly left me alone... really alone... they avoided me like the plague since I wasn't talking... and actually it was good to be alone... I couldn't fake it if people would have been constantly in my face..
Their most frequent comment was... you look tired... you must be feeling sick... I only said yes to all of those things if a comment was made and left it at that...
Now years later I still emotionally feel a wreck... but I must look great on the outside because in the last few weeks I've gotten several compliments from men... including one this week... of course... I did tell H He needs to realize how he almost lost me... and that I would likely not have any trouble getting a new man... not that I want one!

You need to barely respond when others comment... and when you re ready go get a free makeover and samples to try... get a nice new haircut.... mani/ pedi/ massage... you've been through hell and deserve a little pampering... there is nothing more refreshing to the spirit than doing things for YOU to feel better... sometimes if we look better on the outside we feel better on the inside too... someone once told me to fake it till you make it....

Posts: 1308 | Registered: Oct 2010 | From: still lost
♀ 39551
Member # 39551
Default  Posted: 3:55 PM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


But I'm writing it off to passing 40.

Posts: 557 | Registered: Jun 2013
♀ 33226
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 4:19 PM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Um, yeah. Totally. I'm still waiting for that to pass.

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

Posts: 40180 | Registered: Aug 2011
♀ 39560
Member # 39560
Default  Posted: 5:34 PM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes, unfortunately I can relate.

Most people at work think I've got something medically wrong with me. If they ask I just say I'm ok.

My closer coworkers know "something" is wrong in my personal life but I haven't shared details. they offered their help which I really appreciate but don't wish to share all the details.

One close friend at work knows everything and she has been great. She is acting as a cover for me and telling people I just have a lot going on but will be okay.

The other, opposite issue I've encountered is people telling me how "nice" I look because I've lost weight.

They ask what "my secret diet" is and I just tell them exercise and healthy food. I know that's a bit of a white lie but I guess exercise class 4x week + no food is kinda the truth. I sometimes just say thanks but it tears me up inside. They have no clue what price I've paid.
I've lost 25+lbs since June and gone down to a size 6. Sounds great except I don't feel great.

I went for a mani/pedi for the first time in years last week and that "good" feeling lasted about 2 days. After that I was back to feeling blah again. Unfortunately I can't afford more of them.

Searching for other things for that 'feel good' feeling is very challenging but I do try.

Me (BS): 47 him (Xws): 55
together 18 years
DDay1, DDay2, Dday 3: March - June 2013
Dday4 + June 2015 through January 2016
Status: done I called it quits 1-6-2016
The hardest part of letting go is realizing there wasn't much left to hold on to

Posts: 481 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Northeast
♀ 39669
Member # 39669
Default  Posted: 7:10 PM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

TheRealDeal - Mani and Pedi at home? My sis does this all the time! Her toes and nail always look fabulous. Even a little lotion with some Oil in it goes a long way :)

I've just started taking care of my appearance. After years of looking like shit because of stress and my ongoing depression, I've decided to take a stand... or at least try.

[This message edited by Ariabook at 7:10 PM, July 25th (Thursday)]

Posts: 75 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Newwhere
♀ 38263
Member # 38263
Default  Posted: 8:04 PM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Do something little for yourself.

A new lip gloss. A pretty pair of new undies (just to make you feel pretty).

I feel like I aged 10 years in 6 months. I've put a priority on anything for ME and my kiddos right now to make me feel better. I want that new purse? Kids want those toys? A little pampering can make a big difference.

You deserve it.

I choose to thrive. I choose to be happy.

That which doesn't kill me makes me stronger...but damn, aren't I strong enough yet???

Posts: 71 | Registered: Jan 2013
♀ 12802
Member # 12802
Default  Posted: 8:17 PM, July 25th (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Stress comes out in physical ways. If I could go back, I would have definitely taken better care of myself. although I doubt there's a tub of moisturizer big enough..

I wear my emotions on my sleeve.. well, face . No matter how much powder and paint I put on, if I'm pissy or sad or worried, it shows.

It does help once you start to feel better on the inside

Kids on the playground can be so cruel. “Get off the swings you’re like 50, and stop talking about Soundgarden, we don't even know what that is."

Posts: 14938 | Registered: Nov 2006 | From: mercury's underboob
Topic Posts: 8

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