Me: BW, age 69
I also hate the roller coaster. At 11 months out, though, the ups are far more frequent than the downs. Hang in the, Trying--it sounds as though your FWW is doing everything possible. In time, your downs will become less frequent, too.
But I do get it--the triggers and the roller coaster are pretty awful.
Him: WH, age 67
Married 22 years
D-Day: August 14, 2012
9 year LTA with former co-worker and family "friend"/7 years EA+PA, 2 more years EA