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Newest Member: NumbEmptySad (61504)

User Topic: Sucker of the year award
♀ 35624
Member # 35624
Default  Posted: 1:01 AM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Goes to ME....for.shaving WH's back for him during the A.

He said at the time it was just uncomfortable when he worked out and asked me to shave it off for him. Turns out he wasn't even going to the gym.

Hate when these things hit me. True egad moments.

Anyone else feel like a sucker for anything ridiculous?

WH: 41
me: BS, 45
Together 18 1/2 years, married 17
DDAY 8/2/12
OW: EA- friend of 4 months
Status: separated

Posts: 1033 | Registered: May 2012 | From: California
♀ 32554
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 1:05 AM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes, I got one! STBX was trying to find a job so he was working on his LinkedIn profile. He said he had to have a portrait, so he asked me to crop his head/shoulders out of a family portrait we'd taken the holiday previously. I did so. Then he was fussing because you could still see part of a child's hair, so I cropped it more. I was so proud of how I'd helped him do his LinkedIn profile! I was helping him get a job! I was a good wife!

No. Actually, it turns out that he sent that picture to an OW.


Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!

Posts: 10722 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
♀ 18449
Member # 18449
Default  Posted: 1:17 AM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Job interview thing here for me, too:

I cut H's hair and pressed his shirt, dressed him in a nice suit... and sent him straight into the arms of OW.

The "interview" took longer than expected, so he told me he was insecure and sat in the parking lot for a while.

Posts: 12215 | Registered: Mar 2008
♀ 31468
Member # 31468
Default  Posted: 1:45 AM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I've got one - my WH had me help me with his words with friends game - never told me that he was playing with OW.... Ayfkm? It was well before Dday - I had no idea....

Me: BW-46
Him: XWH-46

Status: D 2011
Remarried to a kind and wonderful man - 2017

Above all, be the heroine, not the victim. - Nora Ephron

It is our choices...that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.
- J. K.

Posts: 5287 | Registered: Mar 2011
♀ 38966
Member # 38966
Default  Posted: 2:53 AM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Me,me! I have one. I was emailing WH pics of houses, you know, for possible move into a new house. He was sending his favorites along to OW, for *their* new life together!

Me: BW 50
Him:Peter Pan late 50's
DS: 13
Married 14 years, together 17 years
DDay #1 Nov.2012, plus more, more, more!
OW : 25 years younger


Posts: 306 | Registered: Apr 2013 | From: NW
♀ 37107
Member # 37107
Default  Posted: 3:27 AM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I packed his bags so that he could go and sleep over at OW!!

I was led to believe he had to sleep away from home for 2 nights each week at a B&B for business....

Turns out this B&B was offering a WHOLE lot more than a bed and breakfast

BS 49
Together 32 yrs, M 28 years
2 daughters 27yo(married with 2 children) & 21yo
D-Day 18 Aug 2012
6mth EA lead to 4mth PA with CO-W. I found out 8 1/2 yrs later

Posts: 1310 | Registered: Oct 2012
♀ 31576
Member # 31576
Default  Posted: 4:01 AM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Me too - I drove him to the train station to get the train to OWs house and spend the night!!

Me BS 40
Him WH 41
DDay May 2010

‎"Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self-esteem, first make sure that you are not, in fact, just surrounded by assholes" - William Gibson

Posts: 485 | Registered: Mar 2011 | From: UK
♀ 36976
Member # 36976
Default  Posted: 4:07 AM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I baked him brownies to take on his "business trip".

Posts: 870 | Registered: Sep 2012
♀ 30926
Member # 30926
Default  Posted: 5:39 AM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I picked up his Viagra Rx, he took it with him to bike week in Myrtle Beach. Or as I refer to it, "Fuck Week"! Never occurred to me to count the number of pills as I was a very trusting wife.

BW me 47
WH him 52
married 24 years
DD 9/15/10
3 incredible teenage daughters
"it only hurts when I breathe"

Posts: 268 | Registered: Jan 2011
♀ 39521
Member # 39521
Default  Posted: 5:50 AM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I thought FWH was really missing me and the kids when he was out if town for week all the time so I set up a website to post our family photos on. He called one day asking for the site address, I was so happy he was 'missing us' since he'd been so distant at the time...realized later he was getting the address to show his MCOW

I still have a very hard time with that one, I feel so violated!

And like so many others, I packed his bags and sent him off to her week after week!

Me: BW 37
Him: WH 38
(DDay: 2/2008)
13 years, 5 kids...Seven years of Limbo

“I don't want to get to the end of my life and find that I have just lived the length of it. I want to have lived the width of it as well." ~ Diane Ackerman

Posts: 178 | Registered: Jun 2013
♀ 38604
Member # 38604
Default  Posted: 6:57 AM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'd get up at 3am to take him to the airport, OW would be waiting to pick him up on the other end.... They'd drive the rest of the way to his final destination and spend the week together.

ME - BS 50, Him - WS 46 trying to "R"
4 DD's - blended 26,16, 15 and 13
Multi DDays the grand finale 5/13/2013
From here on out, I am only interested in what is real. Real people, real feelings, that's it, that's all I'm intere

Posts: 476 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: Texas
♀ 35229
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 7:05 AM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

OWUmpteen is a 24 y/o office gopher. A week or two before S the sad clown told me he wanted to get a personal assistant and thought she'd be perfect for the role.

I decided not to speak up about how inappropriate it was (at that stage I didn't suspect her - I trusted her taste more than his fidelity) - during False R he told me he had made a move on her whilst we were separated. Seeing how little regard he had here for his OWN boundaries let alone my boundaries proved to me that we were indeed in False R.

Anywhoo - I'm one of the top assistants in Australia. So I wrote the job description....

.....for OWUmpteen/current GF's current job.

I have to laugh. WTF did I put in that job description exactly?

What a douchebag for asking me to do that, seriously. Lower than a snake's belly button.

I think I win.

[This message edited by StrongButBroken at 7:07 AM, July 29th (Monday)]

I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 6008 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
♀ 17217
Member # 17217
Default  Posted: 7:19 AM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

One Christmas my H came home with a leather belt that he said his secretary gave him. I thought it was a strange gift to give to your boss, really kind of personal – and I did mention that – to which he replied “oh, she bought them for a few other men in the office” ok, whatever.

A few months later he was upset because the buckle or something had broken on the belt and he wanted to buy another belt exactly like it. Honestly, I had forgotten the fact that OW had bought it – and we went shopping (keep in mind, this is the man who had no interest in clothes, I always bought him everything). I finally said, what’s the big deal to which he replied “well, OW bought this for me for Christmas and I’ll feel bad if she knows that it broke” and I really thought he was making a big issue out of nothing and I said “well, really? Do you think she’s going to be THAT close to your belt to realize the difference?"

Little did I know she WAS that close. To this day it makes me sick to think he took me shopping for that……

Me: BS
H had LTA with co-worker
Both mid-50s
Two sons - grown and on their own
DD - April 2010
Please note registration date is not correct. See my profile for details
Status: Your guess is as good as mine.

Posts: 1288 | Registered: Nov 2007
♀ 40057
Member # 40057
Default  Posted: 7:31 AM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Mine kept a copy of the Indian's baseball schedule on the fridge. He would tell me he was going to the game with coworkers then meet the slut. Same with hockey. That or go golfing and actually put his clubs in the car and drive to the motel. Now he tells me what he's doing every minute and you know what. I don't care!! I'll never believe a word he says.

Posts: 3 | Registered: Jul 2013
♀ 22870
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 7:35 AM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I paid the MOW in my case - she worked for us.

I lose the contest, because I fired her ass on D-Day. Then, I took her out to the shop and said to the rest of the employees: "Everyone, say goodbye to Skank. She's not going to work here any more because she and WXH are in lurve."

Stupid bitch.

You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 9168 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
♀ 13447
Member # 13447
Default  Posted: 7:37 AM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Any time I included xOw1 in our life. Going out to dinner, playing tennis, trying to help her when she was struggling with her M.

I saw red flags about how she treated MrH but I ignored them because I trusted HIM.

The two worst moments though. First, she called us scared because she heard something. Her H was working night shift. She insisted MrH come alone while I stay on the phone with her until he got there. This was preA. I encouraged him to go. He did insist I come with him...he tells me now he felt her attention to him was wrong too. Not enough to avoid going the next time she called him over alone...without my knowledge.

Another time MrH and I got into an argument. He went to their house to spend the night. Again, her H was on nightshift. I couldn't take it and went there. He was alone in the guest room prepping his gear (he was a cop then). I got on my knees and begged him to come home. He refused. I should've insisted on staying but instead I left with my tail tucked between my legs. He claims they didn't have sex that night. They waited until the morning.

I feel complicit in the A because of moments like this. This was in '99 and I still feel like puking and crying remembering it and other incidents.

"Being in love" first moved them to promise fidelity: this quieter love enables them to keep the promise. *CS Lewis*

Posts: 11650 | Registered: Jan 2007 | From: Just a fool in limbo
♀ 33062
Member # 33062
Default  Posted: 8:05 AM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh we have all played the fool to these fools!
I would buy my ex hair color so he could literally "get back in the game" for his work/arc trips. He'd ask what clothes looked good; I'd tell him and then tell him how nice he looked...glad I could boost that ego a little more before he'd F his married whore all week while I was working and taking care of the kids...
A few days before his whore came to town he just HAD to buy a really nice sexy car. I went and helped him pick it out, and told him he deserved that really expensive sexy car...he was fing his whore in it just days later. Glad my name was on the title. Jack ass!
He had a two week work trip to Morocco, and I was so excited for him. He missed my parents 40th wedding anniversary party, but I told everyone how excited I was for him to have that guessed it; whore was there and it was a Moroccan sex trip Gov funded.

The best one though is just days before he left me and the kids he was telling me he was having chest pains. I was so worried and kept insisting he go see the Dr. I was so worried he was going to have a heart attack...a few days later I got the whole ILYBNILWY speech and then gone baby gone. Yeah; poor guy was having some anxiety about being the pos coward he is.
I was so embarrassed about all of these for a long while. Not anymore. I'm never going to be embarrassed for being a good person whom at the time was being a good wife and cared (past tense) about him. He's sick! FTG!!

Posts: 662 | Registered: Aug 2011
♀ 38377
Member # 38377
Default  Posted: 8:36 AM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

If shaving the wayward's back gets the award, then they better make two..

xBW~ 37
Two DS~ 9 and 13

Posts: 3120 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: USA
♀ 26853
Member # 26853
Default  Posted: 8:38 AM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Haven't posted in a while but I would get this award too. Yup shaved his back too, I was so blind. These things got me after the fact as well, what hurt me the most were that he didn't think twice about it and likely doesn't now that he is off and happily married to his mistress....

Posts: 314 | Registered: Dec 2009 | From: Canada
♀ 35624
Member # 35624
Default  Posted: 9:08 AM, July 29th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Holy Moly, forgot tha I too took WH shopping for all his new suits and shirts and ties....that he wore on fancy dates with OW.

I helped him for a couple of hours too, learning to tie a tie himself so when he went to his fancy awards dinner in Vegas he would look good. (the fancy awards dinner he took OW too becausenhe couldn't afford to take me)

I think we all win.

WH: 41
me: BS, 45
Together 18 1/2 years, married 17
DDAY 8/2/12
OW: EA- friend of 4 months
Status: separated

Posts: 1033 | Registered: May 2012 | From: California
Topic Posts: 54
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