Cookies are required for login or registration. Please read and agree to our cookie policy to continue.

Newest Member: mkei

General :
Our enemies are our greatest teachers

This Topic is Archived
default

 LadyYoga (original poster member #28611) posted at 12:58 AM on Tuesday, July 30th, 2013

“I must emphasize that merely thinking that compassion and reason and patience are good, will not be enough to develop them. We must wait for difficulties to arise and then attempt to practice these qualities. And who creates such opportunities? Not our friends, of course, but our enemies. They are the ones who give us the most trouble. So if we truly wish to learn, we should consider enemies to be our best teacher!

When a problem first arises, try to remain humble and maintain a sincere attitude and be concerned that the outcome is fair. Of course, others may try to take advantage of you, and if your remaining detached only encourages unjust aggression, adopt a strong stand. This, however, should be done with compassion, and if it is necessary to express your views and take strong countermeasures, do so without anger or ill intent.

Anger and hatred are our real enemies. These are the forces we need to confront and defeat, not the temporary “enemies” who appear intermittently throughout life.” ~ His Holiness the Dalai Lama

Source: the wonderful Shambhala Sun.

I am well aware that most of you think I am nuts. Maybe I am. But, I am trying very hard to believe I am just a good person. That the two people I care about the most didn't mean to hurt me. They were selfish and didn't think of any consequences. That said, I still want to scream sometimes. Tonight is one of those times. But instead I shake my head and pat myself on the back for being superwoman. For learning, as the Dalai says. i am gaining tremendous strength and knowlegde about myslef throughout this rollercoaster ride. I have to interact w her every single day. Via text only. And all matter of fact but ughhh. I hate it. I wish she would move or something, anything. I won't be sad when the karma bus hits. I pity her. I don't like her. She's just my son's friend's mom.

Just venting. Rambling and not even checking for typos.

BS (me) 39
WH 50
DD,DS,DS
D-day 3/11/10 (3 month EA,1 week PA)
Whore was my best friend

posts: 700   ·   registered: May. 26th, 2010
id 6426634
default

 LadyYoga (original poster member #28611) posted at 1:00 AM on Tuesday, July 30th, 2013

One edit. "Cared" about. past tense. I don't give a shit about her now.

BS (me) 39
WH 50
DD,DS,DS
D-day 3/11/10 (3 month EA,1 week PA)
Whore was my best friend

posts: 700   ·   registered: May. 26th, 2010
id 6426638
default

LosferWords ( member #30369) posted at 3:30 AM on Tuesday, July 30th, 2013

I think this is a cool concept. Thanks for sharing.

I also like the fact that it sounds like you are on a strong path to indifference with the AP.

For a vent, I think this was a very constructive one.

posts: 31109   ·   registered: Dec. 11th, 2010
id 6426808
default

iggyD ( member #36171) posted at 6:26 AM on Tuesday, July 30th, 2013

(((Mom)))

I'm very sad for you because no matter how hard you try, you still can't make what you're doing ok can you? And why are you trying so hard to convince us that it's working for you when clearly it isn't?

Gently mom, are you still in IC? This dysfunctional arrangement is feeding something because you choose to continue it when you don't have to.

2012 was a bitch...but I'm hopeful about 2013.

posts: 317   ·   registered: Jul. 18th, 2012
id 6426969
This Topic is Archived
Cookies on SurvivingInfidelity.com®

SurvivingInfidelity.com® uses cookies to enhance your visit to our website. This is a requirement for participants to login, post and use other features. Visitors may opt out, but the website will be less functional for you.

v.1.001.20250404a 2002-2025 SurvivingInfidelity.com® All Rights Reserved. • Privacy Policy