I've been doing pretty well lately. I have been attending celebrate recovery and loving it! I have been working on my codependent behavior and we are planning on renewing our vows on our anniversary in September this year...however today I hit a trigger that has really upset me and I can't seem to shake it.
I was on facebook and I happened upon an update that my fWH's ex-uncle put up about the date of his being in a relationship. The thing is that relationship started while my sister-in-law was married to my brother-in-law. So knowing of their affair and how much pain that causes is bad enough and then to see that date put up as a special thing made me think of how my fWH had 8 such "special" dates of his own and were during our M.
Ugh! I thought I was doing well but this made me angry again! I haven't been very angry for any of this. Mostly just sad. I never really hit an anger stage or anything. I mentioned to my fWH the trigger and he held me quietly even though he was running late to work. I just want normal life back! I don't want to go back to a life with such a lack of emotional intimacy but I do wish I could go back to the days of not having to think of triggers or affair stuff or SA stuff.
