HI Hanging on,
Much of your writing is something I live with, too.
One of my parents desparately wants revenge. S he enjoys name calling and while I understand it is in protection of me, it hurts...doesn't help.
The other parent complains to his GF and family behind my back and I am hearing he complains to my family now.
I am trying to work out of a reputation of codependency, so anything I can do without needing help boosts me. Calling for help does not. I've said this to all of them. It is like my voice is mute.
The IL's are like a species of their own. They are mostly nice to my face-some snub me -but I don't trust them more and more. Most of them know what he did via facebook and I but will protect their own, NMW (no matter what).
You're right...revenge doesn't solve anything and being civil helps things go by quicker.
I feel common ground, because I worry each minute DD is with him and so get no peace out of the "break". He has taken to over-indulging and then sometimes she's come back sick or I have eons of deprogramming.
Yup. Even waiting for my lawyer, like you are.
I think it's the waiting or stillness that pushes at my nerves the most somedays. Do you find that, too?
You sound like a good mom and I can't wait til your kids are back.
A person is a person, no matter how small. -Dr. Suess
Perserverance and spirit have done wonders in all ages.