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Newest Member: Blsoul (61132)

User Topic: Today is my DD's sweet 16 - without me
♀ 30742
Member # 30742
Default  Posted: 1:24 AM, August 1st (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

16 years ago I went into 17 hours of labor just to find out that DD16 was a moon baby and too big and needed to be delivered via emergency c-section. I spent 10 days in the hospital with her, having an infection from the delivery, a fever for a week, not being able to nurse because of the high dose of antibiotics and pain killers they had to give me.

A rough start. But nothing compared to not being with DD on her birthday. This is my first time ever she is not here with me. She is on a roadtrip with her father, a result of this divorce I did not want.

I hate it.

Temporarily independent with the whole world at my feet.

Posts: 1322 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: California
♀ 15906
Member # 15906
Default  Posted: 1:25 AM, August 1st (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


I'm sorry.

BS-me 34
XH-doesn't matter
4 kids

Posts: 1414 | Registered: Aug 2007 | From: PNW country
♀ 32554
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 2:56 AM, August 1st (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Oh no!!!!!!!!! I'm so upset for you. That's just not fair!

Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!

Posts: 10722 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
♀ 35229
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 6:21 AM, August 1st (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


I'm so very sorry. I hate it too.

It feels like time and moments stolen from me - taken against my will.

This is the brutal part - this is the part I will never get used to.

I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 6004 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
♀ 33698
Member # 33698
Default  Posted: 8:12 AM, August 1st (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My kids are going on their out-of-state, weeklong vacation in a couple of days. I hate it and want it over with so much. I know I'll be fine, but like you said, being separated from my babies is the result of his selfish behavior. I didn't sign on for this.

I'm sorry that you can't be with your DD today. I hope you get the chance to talk to her and then plan something nice for when she gets back.


FBS; now happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley

Posts: 4079 | Registered: Oct 2011
♀ 22870
Member # 22870
Default  Posted: 7:32 PM, August 1st (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm sorry.

You can stuff your sorries in a sack, mister. -George Costanza
There is a special place in hell for women who don't help other women. - Madeleine Albright

Posts: 9154 | Registered: Feb 2009 | From: Western PA
♀ 37556
Member # 37556
Default  Posted: 8:37 PM, August 1st (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

(((fraeuken))) I am sorry to hear the pain of your separation from your daughter.

I hope she is at least having a good time on the road trip and that you can plan a fun celebration of her birthday when she returns.

Separation from our children and the impact on them is the worst part of this ugly business.

Me BS 55
Him WS 53
Married 10 years together 13
DDay October 11, 2012

Posts: 134 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Brooklyn, NY
♀ 36654
Member # 36654
Default  Posted: 4:26 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am so sorry. I well remember the pain of the first Christmas and Thanksgiving without my son. The D always ruined the holiday's for me because he had him either 1/2 Christmas day and Christmas eve and every other Thanksgiving. The last few my son didn't even come home. He also got him every Spring Break and that was when his B-day was. It never seemed to bother my son, just me. He got double the attention and presents at Christmas so he was happy. Now I dread the holiday's and would just like to pretend they didn't exist. Hang in there. I can't say it gets better, but you will survive through it. (((HUGS)))

BS-54 XWH#2-No longer my monkey
M-11yrs LTA-5yrs Divorced 8/15
"A person is either an asset or a lesson"
"Changing who you are with does not change who you are"

Posts: 8880 | Registered: Aug 2012 | From: Texas
♀ 39154
Member # 39154
Default  Posted: 7:54 AM, August 3rd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Fraeuken, I read your profile and I have been doing many of the same things you have been doing. I have been reconnecting with old friends whom I lost touch with. Reaching out to make new friends and I am starting a second career and look forward to volunteering in my community reading to kids who live at a family homeless shelter.

This whole ordeal is making me break out and rediscover the world and myself. Since I met my husband, I lost touch with both. I was too busy with work, commute, caring for needs of the family.

Posts: 209 | Registered: May 2013 | From: East Coast, USA
♀ 37756
Member # 37756
Default  Posted: 1:51 PM, August 3rd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I am so sorry!!!! :-( there isn't anything to make it better but I think you are a wonderful mom for letting her go!! <3

Surrender to what is. Let go of what was. Have faith in what will be. -- Sonia Ricotti

Posts: 631 | Registered: Dec 2012
Topic Posts: 10

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