Regular nightmares here too. I am sorry you have these...some I have involve my children too.
In real life I have had gorilla-like feelings inside of me as I walk my children to school and see my wifes AP dropping his kids off too (they would meet after dropping respective kids off at school)...or picking them up...small town, small school, run ins are inevitable...especially since he continues parking on a street between our house and the school. They have bus service to his home AND a regular parent parking and pick up system...but he likes his old way better.....I digress.
At times I have so much gorilla-like feelings that I have voluntarily given up that enjoyable task of dropping off or picking up my girls...so as not to have a criminal record. yep, OM have had the sheriff call me and warn me not to confront him. This is one of the tougher things I have had to give up...tough because there is nothing like seeing your daughters enthusiasm and excitement right before and especially after school (by the time I get home from work those moments have passed)....tough because it is within me to fix this, to control myself to the point of enjoying the moment with my girls and not noticing my wifes AP. Not there yet....
Perhaps comparing myself to a gorilla is unfair to the gorilla as well (as hurtbuthopeful humorously posted above
)...from what I know of gorillas they may be smarter and more in control of themselves then I am at times.
I gotta say...it felt good to impersonate a Silverback even if it was childish...awoke a protection feeling in me I did not know was there....kinda scary but kinda awesome.
Still....I would gladly give up that feeling for no A and no nightmares and no sense that my family was endangered.
Sorry to end on a down note. It is 1:30 am and I am not looking forward to sleeping.
God help us all.
p.s. iPhone typing on here DOES suck.
p.p.s. nightmares are so frequent I don't bother to tell my wife many times....especially because they are so repetitive in nature...she has heard about them enough to know the pretty regular plot involved in each of them. I am a repetitive type of processor...counselor has advised asking myself if my wife and I have addressed a particular subject...and if we have then she has requested I sit on the thought and work through it a bit before re engaging my wife on it. Seems to work on nightmares...rarely wake up in a full sweat anymore.
Peace be with you.
[This message edited by blakesteele at 5:43 AM, August 4th (Sunday)]
ME: 42 BH, I don't PM female members
SHE: 38 EA
Married: 15 years
Together: 17 years
D/Day 9-10-12
NC: 10-25-12
NC: Broken early November 2012, OM not respond
2 girls; 7 and 10
Fear is payments on debts you have not yet incurred.