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Newest Member: manwhocantbemove (45699)

User Topic: An email to respond to? Help requested.
homewrecked2011
♀ 34678
Member # 34678
Default  Posted: 12:08 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

From XWH:

My lawyer told me that I donít have buy any extra stuff for the boys unless I just want to out of the goodness of my heart.. thatís what the child support is for.

So out of the goodness of my heart and for my kids I have ordered sonís class ring and he should have it for the ceremony I also have bought most of the school supplies.


My gosh, he wouldn't have to pat himself so hard on his back if he didn't follow a cheap piece of ass out the door to their lovely travel trailer home!!!

[This message edited by homewrecked2011 at 7:58 PM, August 2nd (Friday)]


Keep Calm and Happy On!

me BS 52
him - 46
married 15 years DIVORCED 10 31 12
children - ds15 ds12
d-day 12-19-11
I gave a 24hour ultimatum then went to attorney next day
Divorce filed


Posts: 2319 | Registered: Jan 2012
ninebark
♀ 24534
Member # 24534
Default  Posted: 12:12 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Actually he is wrong, child support does not cover extras, like class rings, sports, extra circular activities of any kind.

Asshats, why do they think they need a pat on the back when they do something for their kids


BS (me) 40
WH - 48
Married 12 years
DS - 12
D-day 06/21/09
Separated....hopefully divorcing soon.

Posts: 630 | Registered: Jun 2009 | From: Canada
Catwoman
♀ 1330
Member # 1330
Default  Posted: 12:14 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

He is wrong, and I will bet his attorney did not tell him that. What his attorney probably told him is that things like class rings and such are optional and that if he chooses to do so, he does it knowing that it is not necessarily a shared expense unless both parties agree.

I really hate the "that's what child support is for" mantra.

Cat


FBS: Married 20 years, 2 daughters 25 and 22. Divorced by the grace of GOD.
D-Days: 2/23/93; 10/11/97; 3/5/03
Ex & OW Broke up 12-10
"An erection does not count as personal growth."

Posts: 29707 | Registered: Apr 2003 | From: Massachusetts
ajsmom
♀ 17460
Member # 17460
Default  Posted: 12:19 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Please, y'all.

Let's bow to the King!

What an Asshat.

AJ's MOM


Fidelity isn't a feeling...it's a choice.

"Truth has no special time of its own. Its hour is now - always." - Albert Schweitzer
____________________________________________
Me: BW - Him: 200+ # tumor removed 7/09
DS - 31 - Yikes!


Posts: 21097 | Registered: Dec 2007 | From: Been Through Hell...On My Way Back
Tearsoflove
♀ 8271
Member # 8271
Default  Posted: 12:55 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

So out of the goodness of my heart and for my kids I have ordered sonís class ring and he should have it for the ceremony I also have bought most of the school supplies.

Congratulations, Asshat. You have successfully pretended to be a father who cares. Now if you'll excuse me, I have things to do for our children "out of the goodness of my heart" that I won't bother texting you about. In my world, I just call it being a parent and don't need kudos from you to do it.

[This message edited by Tearsoflove at 12:56 PM, August 2nd (Friday)]


"Just because I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand." ~Homer Simpson


Posts: 4242 | Registered: Sep 2005
Helen of Troy
♀ 26419
Member # 26419
Default  Posted: 12:56 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

@ AJsMom

Posts: 4725 | Registered: Dec 2009
ButterflyGirl
♀ 38377
Member # 38377
Default  Posted: 1:04 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

An email to respond to? Oh hell no.. Unless you want to write, "Good widdle puppy. Here's your treat. Now F off and go play with your cheap piece of ass." Which I don't really recommend


xBW~ 35
Two DS~ 7-Eleven
"I've wiped the shit off. It can be wiped off you know." ~ asurvivor

Posts: 2627 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: Florida, USA
hoya96
♀ 28851
Member # 28851
Default  Posted: 1:06 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This timely because I just sent an article to ex (not that he responded) because when I asked him if he could share the expense of the mandatory $100 graphing calculator DS needs for Algebra, he once again gave me the child support line. The article said that child support is designed to provide "basic needs" (ie clothing, shelter, food) for the children, but is NOT designed to cover extras (I think the examples the article gave were SAT prep classes, driving instruction, college application fees, etc).

I would gladly take the self-congratulatory pat on the back e-mails if he actually helped pay for anything beyond medical and child support.

[This message edited by hoya96 at 1:07 PM, August 2nd (Friday)]


Me: 40 and fabulous!
3 children ages 10, 12 and 14
Ex said he wanted separation 2/14/10
DDay #1: 5/23/10 18 month affair with his 22 yr old paralegal
DDay #2 9/22/10 my best friend, now his wife
Divorced: 12/10/10
Re-married a wonderful man.

Posts: 329 | Registered: Jun 2010
Nature_Girl
♀ 32554
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 1:18 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Congratulations, Asshat. You have successfully pretended to be a father who cares. Now if you'll excuse me, I have things to do for our children "out of the goodness of my heart" that I won't bother texting you about. In my world, I just call it being a parent and don't need kudos from you to do it.

NAILED IT!

Of course, no, you shouldn't respond at all. At. All.


Me = BS (Stay-at-home-mom)
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wJgjyDFfJuU

Posts: 10001 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
homewrecked2011
♀ 34678
Member # 34678
Default  Posted: 3:16 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I never thought of that,, Catwoman,, he probably made this up.


Keep Calm and Happy On!

me BS 52
him - 46
married 15 years DIVORCED 10 31 12
children - ds15 ds12
d-day 12-19-11
I gave a 24hour ultimatum then went to attorney next day
Divorce filed


Posts: 2319 | Registered: Jan 2012
homewrecked2011
♀ 34678
Member # 34678
Default  Posted: 3:16 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

double post

[This message edited by homewrecked2011 at 7:46 PM, August 2nd (Friday)]


Keep Calm and Happy On!

me BS 52
him - 46
married 15 years DIVORCED 10 31 12
children - ds15 ds12
d-day 12-19-11
I gave a 24hour ultimatum then went to attorney next day
Divorce filed


Posts: 2319 | Registered: Jan 2012
Kajem
♀ 36134
Member # 36134
Default  Posted: 4:18 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

You don't need to respond, he didn't ask a question.

He is informing you so you can properly thank him ie bow before his greatness. Don't bother he didn't buy you anything. Let DS write a thank you note.

I got the CS is for everything the kids need... I got sooo much money I should have been saving for them for college so they could attend without getting loans. All of that on the MINIMUM allowed CS for 4 kids with his income. Yeah right.

No questions... crickets.

Hugs,

K


I trust you is a better compliment than I love you, because you may not trust the person you love, but you can always love the person you trust. - Unknown
Relationships are like sharing a book, it doesn't work if you're not on the same page.

Posts: 5528 | Registered: Jul 2012 | From: Florida
LadyQ
♀ 32847
Member # 32847
Default  Posted: 4:26 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

No question=no response.

Believe me, I disobeyed the cardinal rule last week. I responded to a text. By the time the exchange was over, I felt as though I needed a shower.

Don't respond!


Tune out the noise of what others tell you about who you are and work it out for yourself...

Posts: 1650 | Registered: Jul 2011
Mousse242
♀ 6330
Member # 6330
Default  Posted: 4:32 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

What does your divorce decree say about extras (athletic costs, prom, etc.)?

Posts: 5473 | Registered: Jan 2005 | From: Chicago
Housefulloflove
♀ 38458
Member # 38458
Default  Posted: 5:02 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Out of the goodness of his heart? That explains why the gesture was so small and was followed up with a nasty email to you...there is no goodness there.

If he wants to pat himself on the back for doing something any half-ass father would do, whatever. It's probably best not to respond. No need to give him the attention he is so desperately seeking.


Me-29 Starting over
ExWH-29 Probable NPD, PA, manchild
3 beautiful young children
DDay 1/20/13 Admits PA
No remorse so NO R. DIVORCED! 9/2013

Posts: 541 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: USA
SBB
♀ 35229
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 5:15 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Out of the goodness of his heart? That explains why the gesture was so small and was followed up with a nasty email to you...there is no goodness there.


They need a rueful laugh emoticon.

Our decree states he pay all school expenses including uniforms bags, lunchboxes etc. It then states 70/30 'agreed' all other non-school expenses.

No response. Write several responses out here. Do try to see the funny side of it so he doesn't yank your chain.


I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 5651 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
homewrecked2011
♀ 34678
Member # 34678
Default  Posted: 7:57 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

No response. Write several responses out here.

Good idea Strong....

I was thinking of responding:

ROFLMAO -- your atty did not tell you any such thing and if he did, he'd NEVER say put this in an email to your XW!
Please be sure to share this with OW because she needs a laugh, too.

--------------------

Or: Sorry, no evidence of good heart. You went to 3 marriage counselors with me, blaming me for everything while NOT standing up and saying, "I have some responsibility here, as I've been f*****g my friend's wife for 1 year. I want out of this marriage because I am going to steal my friend's wife, children, and home from him." At least you would have told the truth instead of HIDING behind the children you say you have this huge heart for. AND no one with a heart walks out after dinner one night LEAVING these precious children.


Don't worry, I'm understanding that crickets is prob best.

[This message edited by homewrecked2011 at 7:59 PM, August 2nd (Friday)]


Keep Calm and Happy On!

me BS 52
him - 46
married 15 years DIVORCED 10 31 12
children - ds15 ds12
d-day 12-19-11
I gave a 24hour ultimatum then went to attorney next day
Divorce filed


Posts: 2319 | Registered: Jan 2012
SBB
♀ 35229
Member # 35229
Default  Posted: 8:04 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Brilliant!

No response IS best. Not probably. By opening your shield to get a jab in he gets another chance at a jab.

Shields Up!


I may have reached a point where I'd piss on him if he was on fire.... eventually!!

Posts: 5651 | Registered: Apr 2012 | From: Australia
peridot
♀ 18334
Member # 18334
Default  Posted: 8:05 PM, August 2nd (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

One time my XH actually thought I would believe he talked to his attorney on a Sunday.

I would not respond to him. There's no need.

I also get tired of hearing,"that's what CS is for".


I think...therefore, I'm single.

It is what it is.


Posts: 4801 | Registered: Feb 2008
homewrecked2011
♀ 34678
Member # 34678
Default  Posted: 5:23 PM, August 4th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I have read his email again,,,, my XWH is pathetic. Now I see why you all say NC and give them "crickets".

When I first get emails from him they trigger me and I get into a place that I want to send arrows back at him... But, after a few days I see how lame he really is....

In fact, recently he told me he doesn't go to our son's band 1/2 time shows because he doesnt' like football. WTF? Neither does my son! It's the 1/2 time marching band show you are there to watch. Our son,,, who has practiced 2x a day from mid July and every day 3 hours after school... is why you should go to support NOT because you don't like football.


I am really becoming VERY happy with my life,,,without him in it.


Keep Calm and Happy On!

me BS 52
him - 46
married 15 years DIVORCED 10 31 12
children - ds15 ds12
d-day 12-19-11
I gave a 24hour ultimatum then went to attorney next day
Divorce filed


Posts: 2319 | Registered: Jan 2012
Topic Posts: 34
Pages: 1 · 2

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