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Chippednotbroken (original poster member #40170) posted at 5:22 PM on Sunday, August 4th, 2013
This is my first post. I just found out a few days ago, truthfully I can't even remember when it was exactly.
We have been married 10 years. 3 kids. I just had the 3rd two weeks before D-day. I found text messages. He didn't admit at first so I contacted her.
He wants to reconcile. I've been through so much abuse by him. Emotional and sexual and now this. I feel shutdown, like I can't actually feel.
I'm too embarrassed to tell anyone.
Me 34 (former BS)
Happily Divorced November 17, 2014.
3 young kids all under 9.
"I'm sorry you don't like my honesty. But to be fair, I don't like your lies."
Kerpgh ( member #30453) posted at 10:14 PM on Sunday, August 4th, 2013
Please try to think clearly regarding what is important to you....is this something you really want to fix?? We are hear to support you what ever you decide...big hugs
Together 20 years (married 11)
Me: 41
WH: 37
Two children (9 & 7)
Whore: 25
Dday 11/10/2010
False R 12/17/2010
Moved back 2/10/2012
Trying to reconcile
Pippy ( member #16482) posted at 10:19 PM on Sunday, August 4th, 2013
Oh Hon, I am so sorry you have to go through this. You must be exhausted with a new baby and sleeplees nights. Please take care of yourself.
First you have no reason to be embarrassed. You need to be able to have a confidante in real life. Don't face this alone. Has he ever physically abused you? If so, you need to get away from him with your kids.
You say he wants to R. Has he expressed remorse, been transparent, willing to go to MC or IC?
Please take care of yourself and keep posting. Posts are slow on the weekends but help will come. Also read the Healing Library. Hugs.
I divorced him because I didn't like his girlfriend.
Chippednotbroken (original poster member #40170) posted at 12:33 AM on Monday, August 5th, 2013
He is willing to go to MC. I'm not sure that I am. He never fully admits its his fault. I guess at this point I feel ambushed. I'm going to a family law attorney tomorrow.
Me 34 (former BS)
Happily Divorced November 17, 2014.
3 young kids all under 9.
"I'm sorry you don't like my honesty. But to be fair, I don't like your lies."
myperfectlife ( member #39801) posted at 2:21 AM on Monday, August 5th, 2013
(((hugs)))
Good for you for going to see an attorney.
If this relationship is not a healthy place for you to be, maybe this is the nudge you have needed to leave it behind.
I cannot be responsible for another's personal growth.
DDay#1 of a "cheatillion" 4/1/13
Divorce final 11/04/13
Chippednotbroken (original poster member #40170) posted at 4:42 PM on Monday, October 28th, 2013
I decided to stay. For now. It a really rough patch the last few days. Was hoping being at work would help but I find myself having that I want to cry feeling. How do those of you who have been dealing for awhile not constantly scream at your partner? I just want to tell him over and over how much I want to leave and how could he do these things...
Me 34 (former BS)
Happily Divorced November 17, 2014.
3 young kids all under 9.
"I'm sorry you don't like my honesty. But to be fair, I don't like your lies."
forlornheart ( member #40726) posted at 5:17 PM on Monday, October 28th, 2013
I can't truly give advice as I separated once I found out my H had yet another affair.
But I can relate to the feelings of I hate you, I hate what you did to the kids, I hate what you did to me.
Who knows why they do what they do? If I was unhappy in my marriage I would go for some counseling or divorce, I wouldn't go out and cheat. That's only making everything worse.
I do hope his abusive tendencies are under control. For me, that would be a deal breaker.
Take care of you and your kids. Congratulations on the new addition 
Hugs!
Deb
Edited to correct an error.
[This message edited by forlornheart at 11:20 AM, October 28th (Monday)]
Me: 48- BW
Him: 45-WH-chronic cheater, PA and EA
Current Her: Mid to late 30's fatassed, no necked, troglodyte
D Day: August 23, 2013
Separated: August 23, 2013
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