Last year I attended the holiday party for the wayward's company. It's a traditional company gathering and the they do a pretty nice job. Shortly before the party, the wayward told me of her infidelity.
What she didn't say was that her maintenance man/affair partner greeted us at the door (with me not knowing who he was) and that her regional boss had escorted him to her bedroom in the supervisor's apartment after the wayward had passed out from drinking several months previously.
Yesterday the wayward called me asking me about a "holiday party survey". I triggered heavily and was terribly upset for the rest of the evening. I am still upset thinking about that evening. We had our picture taken at the party: two deer caught in the headlights.
The regional manger also insisted we go to her hotel room and drink heavily until late after the party. My wayward refused to leave and stayed well past the time I wanted out. And this was before I knew what the regional manager had done to incite the betrayals.
Needless to say I was upset about the mere notion of returning to a party where her AP will be attending and her manager will be present in a "holiday"/drunken partying mood.
I insisted there be no further attendance at a function sponsored by the the company; conferences are to be attended only with me and if that's not possible, than she must return home at the end of the day and drive back to the conference the next day.
I also set down some requirements for counseling goals, both long and short term and asked to see the counselor's treatment plan.
She was upset by the request to see the treatment plan; she has IC today so we'll see what happens.
I am feeling upset and hurt again and was doing better. I hate being triggered and am determined to do something about it. I have IC on Thursday and I think I'll have to start coming up with some strategies to deal with the triggers.
Any thoughts on any of my ramblings will be a blessing.
[This message edited by phoenixrivers at 11:48 AM, August 6th (Tuesday)]