Up until four months ago he did nothing. We went to MC together for the first three months, but then I discovered he and the OW were in contact. I stopped MC - there was no point.
I used to defend him and why he wasn't doing anything to help with R. When I think back to those times, I'm embarrssed by having done that. I guess I just didn't want to see that he wasn't committed.
So I stopped suggesting R and worked on myself. I stopped defending him, too.
Since April he has been calling me and asking to see me. He tells me he misses me. He acknowledges my triggers and apologizes for hurting me (with sincerity this time). He actually answers my questions about the A without getting defensive and angry.
It's not much -I admit that. But this is the man that ran away when things got too "emotional" for him. Believe me, I take all of this at face value and I don't put much stock in it.
They are baby steps. If he wants R, there are other things he is going to have to do before I would ever agree.