Me–BS age 61
I had my first appointment with a psychiatrist today. They spent most of the morning doing a complete physical workup to rule out any underlying medical conditions, had me take a Minnesota Multiphasic Personality Test, then the shrink came in and told me I have a lot of ‘stressors’ in my life (Y’ Think! sarcasm intended
). He also explained the sudden weight loss, anxiety attacks, and trouble sleeping are a result of the stress-induced anxiety. (Wow—like I couldn’t figure that out all on my own)
He did prescribe an antidepressant and something for anxiety. I go back to see him again on Monday and will be seeing him weekly while the medication kicks in. He said his experience with infidelity has been that I would likely never get the whole story of my wife’s infidelity nor ever again look at our marriage in the same way.
Because it will be some time before I can confront my wife, he also wants me to see a psychologist that specializes in infidelity with the emphasis on the betrayed spouse. He claims the one he has in mind will help me be able to better manage confronting my wife about her betrayal, instruct me in how to phrase questions without being confrontational and putting her on the defensive as well as give me some coping skills to handle the answers I get.
Does this sound reasonable?
I have some reservations because the psychologist he is recommending is a woman. It is hard to discuss this with anyone and I’m not feeling particularly trusting of the female of the species right now.
On the other hand, who better than a woman to teach a man how to have this discussion with a woman?
Me–BS age 60
Her -- WS age 58
Married for 33 years
One child, 30yrs old
Status –sick at heart
Her -- WS age 59
Married for 34 years
One child, 30yrs
Her 'A' 1994(?) through 1998
D-Day 7/4/2013 Yes, I didn't find out for almost 15 years... but the pain is just as bad as if she were with him last week.