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Newest Member: Gypsy2017 (60730)

User Topic: Contact During Their "Vacation Week"
♀ 27886
Member # 27886
Default  Posted: 5:32 PM, August 9th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

My SBXH has our daughter on a 3 out of 5 weekend schedule. He also takes her one week during the Summer. This is the third year. He hasn't taken her away on a vacation because of the financial mess he has put himself in. They just stay at his place and do things that don't cost much money if any. Our daughter is autistic and has very limited language. I asked him if during the week he could keep me in touch on how things are going with texting. He wrote two hours after he picked her up and I haven't heard from him since. When your children are away for a week, do you have any contact with them or your spouse if they are younger? I don't expect it during the weekends, but thought he could do it during the week since I asked.

Posts: 96 | Registered: Mar 2010 | From: Pennsylvania
♀ 34678
Member # 34678
Default  Posted: 5:41 PM, August 9th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Our divorce papers say both parents shall have reasonable and private phone conversations with child.

Next time, start out a couple of weeks ahead emailing: I would like to talk to our child each evening before bed when you have her for the week.

If your divorce isn't final yet, get this put into the final papers. Also, a quick call to your atty and him calling SBXH should get this resolved if you want to talk to her today.

[This message edited by homewrecked2011 at 5:44 PM, August 9th (Friday)]

Sometimes He calms the storm. Sometimes He lets the storm rage, but calms His child.
Dday 12/19/11
I gave a 24hour ultimatum then went to attorney next day. Shocked the hell out of him, with D papers, I'm proud to say!
D final10/30/2012

Posts: 4053 | Registered: Jan 2012
♀ 27186
Member # 27186
Default  Posted: 5:53 PM, August 9th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I usually talk/text with the ex at least once a day, but more often multiple times. I send a text when I wake up just asking how they are, and I'll send one before they go to sleep to have them call if they want. They're active boys, so they usually don't call, but ex still replies. The ex calls every night I have them as well, just to see how their days went. Have you tried sending a text? No way my ex could think about doing something like that on his own,

BS-34; WXH-32; DS8; DS3; OC3
DDay: SEPT 2008
Divorced: JUNE 2010

Posts: 318 | Registered: Jan 2010 | From: Indy
♀ 38405
Member # 38405
Default  Posted: 5:57 PM, August 9th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I don't speak with my son but mainly because he is two and his father hasn't had him for more than 4 nights yet. That will change though once the divorce is final.

Once a cheater, always a cheater happens when your cheater doesn't have remorse.
Regret is not remorse- know the difference!

Posts: 680 | Registered: Feb 2013 | From: DC
♀ 32554
Member # 32554
Default  Posted: 8:44 PM, August 9th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

No way in hell I would go a week without speaking to my children.

Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!

Posts: 10722 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
♀ 27886
Member # 27886
Default  Posted: 9:13 PM, August 9th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I asked him when he picked her up if he would send me some texts during the week to let me know how things were going. He seemed very agreeable to it. He sent me one that night and I have not heard from him since. I sent him two today which he has not responded to. Maybe his girlfriend told him he shouldn't do it. My daughter is autistic and does not have the language to use the phone.

Posts: 96 | Registered: Mar 2010 | From: Pennsylvania
♀ 28851
Member # 28851
Default  Posted: 9:53 PM, August 9th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Considering my ex is litigious, accuses me on a regular basis of parental alienation, and sent me an article about how contacting kids on the other parents' time is a form of alienation... no. I don't.

My kids are older, though, and when they text me while they're at their Dad's, I very eagerly respond!

I'm at my longest time during the year when I don't see them (almost 2 weeks, his summer visitation) and it's very hard. But it is what it is.

Me: 43 and fabulous!
3 children ages 13, 15 and 17
Ex said he wanted separation 2/14/10
DDay #1: 5/23/10 18 month affair with his 22 yr old paralegal
DDay #2 9/22/10 my best friend, now his wife
Divorced: 12/10/10
Re-married a wonderful man.

Posts: 342 | Registered: Jun 2010
♀ 33698
Member # 33698
Default  Posted: 10:13 PM, August 9th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I told my kids (who are coming back from their week's vacation tomorrow-- yay!) that they could call me whenever they wanted to. DD called twice because she missed me. But, I was able to cheer her up, so I was glad that XWH let her. We then have the understanding that I will call at the halfway point on Wednesday to check in and say hello. Otherwise, I keep my distance because that is their time with him and his parents, and I would resent the heck out of him if he called me constantly while the kids were away with me. Plus, I don't want to set my kids back emotionally-- if I call, they'll miss me and feel sad, etc. Better to leave it up to them if they want to call.

However, I do not have children with special needs, so that is totally different. I might want an end-of-the-day check in, like before bed to say goodnight.

FBS; now happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley

Posts: 4079 | Registered: Oct 2011
♀ 18334
Member # 18334
Default  Posted: 12:41 AM, August 10th (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Is there any way you could do a video chat on a webcam?

I think...therefore, I'm single.

It is what it is.

Posts: 4920 | Registered: Feb 2008
Topic Posts: 9

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