(((((((scoteye13)))) <----those are hugs.
You are not weak, you are a normal loving person who is trying to cope with the bomb that has exploded in her life.
The 180 is a rough go for almost everyone at first. I can't tell you how many times I fell off the 180 wagon. These are the hardest days, but trust me, it will get better.
One day, the 180 will come naturally. Your heart and your mind will say "enough". You deserve better. You don't deserve to be called names by the person who was supposed to be your greatest supporter. He is abusing you, verbally and emotionally.
Don't beg him to stay, as much as you might want too. I was on the floor attached to WS ankles while he tried to drag himself away to see OW--it was humiliating, and most importantly, it didn't work. It just made me pathetic in his eyes, and made him believe that I was always an option in case he wanted to come back. The 180 will help you detach, and give him a dose of reality regarding what his shitty choices have brought.
Can you make it so that he does not come to the house? He is your biggest trigger right now, and the source of all your pain. Stop the bleeding and get him the hell away from you.
If being unable to eat or sleep continues, please see a doctor for help. Take care of you. We are here for you.