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Newest Member: FrustratedJoker (61483)

User Topic: blah
♀ 37908
Member # 37908
Default  Posted: 10:43 AM, August 13th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

8 months out almost and the roller coaster is still going full blast. i can go days and weeks with out thinking about the A but when I does pop into my head the low is beyond low. I am still stuck on the sex part of the A and not the hurt that it has caused me. I still don't believe that he didn't enjoy sex with her because if he didn't why would he go back and do it again? I still don't feel like I will ever have the full story as WH doesn't know what any of the texts he and she sent said. that i actually believe because he doesn't remember half of my texts if he deletes them. I know there has been NC between them since DDAY as he no longer has a phone and email is something he never has done. but i have the passwords to the email he does have. and seeing as we live 100 miles away from OW now and have since 4 months out and I drive him to and from work cause we share a car. I hate that I don't trust him. I hate having to check in on him. the feeling I get when he takes to long to get his call at work.....or when he gets bombarded by problems at the end of the work day and ends up staying an extra 30 minutes.........some days I just want to end the marriage and be done with this hell that is my life.

There better not be a "next time"

Posts: 90 | Registered: Dec 2012 | From: a mere speck in a much bigger picture
♀ 32122
Member # 32122
Default  Posted: 11:39 AM, August 13th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

8 months isn't that far out. I am three years out and still have my bad days.

It takes time. But as many here have proven its possible to have a happy marriage again.

What is HE doing to help you?

What things are you doing for yourself? Are you in MC or IC? Do you have friends or family you can talk to?

Me: BS 38
WH: 30 (BrokenHeart911)
Four little dragons.
He had an EA with OW1 (coworker) and lots of online dating profiles.
DDay of PA with OW2 (also a co worker) October 19th 2010.
"The A is the wound, the lies are the salt" - Stronger08

Posts: 11321 | Registered: May 2011 | From: Canada
♀ 24643
Member # 24643
Default  Posted: 12:55 PM, August 13th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

After A trauma, there are 3 healings that need to occur simultaneously:
1. BS
2. WS
3. Marriage/Relationship
The first two may benefit from IC, and the third may respond well to the safe environment of MC.

some days I just want to end the marriage and be done with this hell that is my life.

Have you discussed this with an objective person in real life, like a mentor, pastor or IC?

"We must be willing to let go of the life we planned so as to have the life that is waiting for us." ~J. Campbell
"In the final analysis, it is your own attitude that will make or break you, not what has happened to you." ~D. Galloway

Posts: 2144 | Registered: Jun 2009
Topic Posts: 3

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