Yes, I have seen the movie and it is referred to quite a bit on the forum, and yes bunny boilers are mentioned and the very term comes straight from the bunny boiler in the movie.
My H had a crazy stalker like that. I hate to ever say anything remotely kind about the OW, but while she did some of the same stalking/fishing type things, as far as I can tell, she was no where near as crazy as the "Stalker." My H never had an A with the stalker. They started out as "friends" when he was single and she was married.
She offered "free babysitting" for his DD. He says he paid her anyway, but over time felt obligated to be friendly with her because she did so much for he and his DD. This was back in the early to mid '90s and he was not familiar with the word stalker, but from what he told me, he was aware that she was nutty and it creeped him out. He was also NOT attracted to her, even if she had been single.
Still he was conflict avoider type and just hoped in time she would get the hint and ease off.
Since they were "friends" he had no problem telling her when he was going on dates, or had new love interests. He thought that would clarify it if she thought there was some chance for "them."
But she would find his truck anywhere he went on weekends, and "join" him and force her "friendship" on him. Well, we met because of her. The night we met, he asked a male buddy to go out of town with him, saying "there are no good women in this town." (But he was really thinking he wanted to go where the stalker could not find him).
So we met that night, and were engaged within a month. He told stalker he was in love and bought me a ring (I know he was a conflict avoider but how stupid do you have to be, to not really understand what he was telling her, and WHY he was telling her?)
But I guess she was that stupid. She continued stalking after we got married and stepped up her game. She used his DD to get information about our marriage, any fights or problems we had, etc. It actually escalated to the point I wish I had called the cops on her, but I never really caught her doing anyting particularly threatening. She did the hangup calls though, and I still have a letter she wrote me where she admitted doing that. (Also, who is stupid enough to admit to harassing hangup calls in a handwritten letter....oh yeah she is that stupid).
One of H's sisters is her on again, off again friend. Actually they are two of kind and I'm sure the only time they care for each other is when it is to the direct advantage of the other. So I take anything the sister says with a grain of salt, but during one of those "off again" times, the sister told me that Stalker admitted following me around town in her car "just to see where I would go." Stalker also said she was very depressed and carrying a gun in her purse.
We took some action to get her out of our lives and it seemed to work for several years, but she started up her game again when his mother and DD died in 2006.
My FIL died in 2008 and she had the gall to show up at the funeral home. Of course she was there to support her friend, my sister in law. SIL had not spoken to her father in the year before he died and refused to see him when he asked for her on his deathbed. But at the funeral, SIL acted like the most hurt of all. That is another story. But I didn't feel stalker had a good reason to be there and believe she was there to insert herself into our family's business once again (stalking but thinking we'd never tell her to get lost at a funeral home). Well, I did humiliate her and she left in tears. We have not heard from her since.
One last commment about the movie Fatal Attraction. Most OWs are not bunny boilers but when you start to see the signs, take them seriously. The movie is fiction but there are people out there who are "like that."
The idea from the movie posted here most often is how the worst thing you can do to an OW is "ignore" them because the character says "I will NOT be ignored!" When this is said on the forum it is usually a recommendation TO IGNORE them since they hate that.
I disagree. While I agree they hate being ignored, if we are really interested in our own safety and getting the bunny boiler to leave us a lone, some kind of action needs to be taken.
While active back and forth engagement is definitely not a good idea, getting some legal help on your side and getting an official letter out to the bunny boiler letting her know that legal action will be taken is a good move IMO.