As for confidential type scores and testing, grades, you could ask her to step out of the room?
As a teacher, there are all kinds of adults present in the lives of children. If they are interested enough to come to conferences at school, that is usually a good thing.
Perhaps the new wife could take dd on a walk if the conference ran long or she got antsy?
I base all of this on the fact that you stated you weren't against her being there and that the coparenting relationship is described as positive.
My issue, I guess, is that she constantly emanates an air of superiority over everyone in every situation (and has since we were in high school). Since I am the mother and a teacher (currently staying home with my babies, but the education and experience are there), I am really irritated by even the prospect of her taking this attitude. As a quick example, when we were trying to figure out who needed to fill out the free and reduced lunch forms, her response was, 'Oh, well, I am SURE we won't qualify and there's a MUCH better chance she will if YOU fill it out'. (Caps added to show her emphasis)
[This message edited by musiclovingmom at 8:15 PM, August 13th (Tuesday)]
It would help to know that dynamic-- if your ex is assertive around her, and you can count on him to help you with solid decision-making, I'd let her spout her little head off if it makes her feel better. But if you think that he'll just say, "Yeah, what Now-Wife says," then maybe you should have separate conferences to keep things civil.
WH says marriage is over: May 15, 2009.
EA#2 July 20, 2009. Legally sep: Aug 16, 2009. DIVORCED!!!! Signed Nov 23, final Dec 24, 2010, adultery listed.
New wife works nights and sleeps days
schedule the conferences at the MOST inconvenient time possible.
Failing that, let the twit talk. Thank her for her input, and ignore every word she says.
Talk in the teacher code, of IEP, PEP, NCLB, dibbles, essential standards, word walls, site words, expected growth, and leave her out of the conversation altogether.